A personal eulogy

Theo, I think you were pathetic.
And for that, I admired you.
There are few in this country of cultivated and idealized mediocrity who dare to show their own strengths and weaknesses as you did.
Your troubles in love showed in your attempts to film it, with the same passion which apparently prevented you from having something alike a stable relationship. I remember interviewing a woman at ABN Amro who, according to the rumor mill, was about to marry you. You cancelled it at the last moment - probably for the best. (Women tend not to like drinking from a firehose, even when they're thirsty.)
Your love for this country showed in the way you chastised it. I'm not going to quote Goethe here - you know what I'm referring to.
And your troubles with yourself - well - you didn't take care of yourself very well. The fact that your website is called 'The Healthy Smoker' says enough. Let's leave it at that.
Your weaknesses were your strengths, and the other way around. You dared to embrace chaos and criticize it at the same time. It's a dichotomy which could tear apart even the strongest of men.
Perhaps I should be grateful someone prevented that from happening, but I am not.

A faithful reader of your website,

Arjan

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