|
|
Saturday, August 28, 2010
Sunday, September 21, 2008
Verhuizing / change of address |
|
Per 1 oktober hoop ik te verhuizen naar Hoofdweg 718, 1055 AB Amsterdam. Mailt u mij alstublieft voor mijn nieuwe vaste nummer. Mijn mobiele nummer blijft hetzelfde. Gebruikt u alstublieft nummerherkenning als u mij belt, anders zie ik u wellicht voor een telemarketeer aan.
U wilt foto's? Nou, vooruit: 1, 2.
Effective 10/1/2008 I'll be living at Hoofdweg 718, 1055 AB Amsterdam. Please drop me a line to get my new telephone number. My cell phone number remains unchanged. Please use caller id when contacting me. Otherwise, I might mistake you for a telemarketer.
Oh, and here are a few pictures: 1, 2.
|
22:13 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Sunday, January 6, 2008
Friday, August 17, 2007
Leaving at Quotenet, or: how my professional blogging exploits came to an end |
|
"There is an appointed time for everything, and a time for every affair under the heavens."
I do not want to claim divine inspiration, but I do feel elated after finally biting a bullet that had been aimed at my teeth for some time.
I've just sent an email to the fine people of business magazine Quote expressing my intent to stop blogging on Quotenet. Since our agreement entailed giving one another a month's notice if either party ever wanted to end our partnership, I will effectively write my last paid blog entry before September 17.
Henceforth, my income will come from 'normal' articles, columns, the lectures I give, the workshops and brainstorm sessions I organize, the books I write as well as the teaching I will do at the Rijksuniversiteit Groningen (University of Groningen), having just accepted a job offer to become part of their journalism faculty from September 1 onwards.
Sometimes, a marriage can drag itself out for too long. I've been writing short blog entries for Quotenet about fast cars and Paris Hilton for a bit too long. And like Hilton I'm not of the monogamous persuasion. Even the most pleasurable thing will get boring if you do it for too long with the same person.
(That's all the innuendo you'll get today. Promise.)
I'd still be happy to write about business, money and famous people, of course. But please don't ask me to blog about it for a while. Size does matter. OK, so I broke my promise.
And yes, leisure blogging has now officially resumed. Like all journalists, I never really get tired of myself ;-).
|
17:28 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Saturday, July 28, 2007
Saturday, January 27, 2007
Monday, January 8, 2007
Five things you didn't know about me |
|
I doubt anyone is interested, but in the interests of being a good sport I'll give you five anyway. The reason for this sudden display of openness can be found here, where fellow blogger Jaap Stronks invited me coerced me into doing so by including me in his nefarious chain letter scheme. I will not burden five other bloggers with this duty, but as far as my answers go, here they come:
1. Before I die, I want to have seen the Earth from space, preferably from orbit. Hopefully, Branson et al will get their kit together soon. For my part, I'm willing to sell my assets to get there. That means all of them if necessary (except my cat Ender, whom I don't consider to be my property, other than in a legal sense). Of course, being Dutch, I'll probably end up waiting for a bargain anyway.
2. While we're on the subject of pets, I am a 'closeted' proponent of (limited) animal rights, in the Dominion sense. The main bottleneck seems to be that I like eating meat too much to fully commit to this position. This probably also makes me somewhat of a hypocrite as well as an opportunist (if carrots would taste as well as steaks, hey...), or in other words, rather human. Maybe NASA can rescue me.
3. After 9/11, I seriously considered signing up for the military, but quickly reconsidered after remembering I was turned down for the draft in 1993 on medical grounds. I have had minor hearing problems since birth, and am unable to hear much above 10 kHz. For some reason you need better ears to learn to lob grenades than to get a pilot's license, or to play classical guitar at near-conservatory level. Never mind, I've got too much of an authority problem to be a decent soldier anyway.
4. Barring that, I am still considering a stint as a war reporter, and have indeed recently met with a colonel of the Dutch defence academy to get my military knowledge up to speed. The risk of getting killed in a war zone makes the first item on this list even more of a priority, of course. Perhaps it's possible to combine the two - it seems we'll have Space Marines soon!
5. Although I'm apparently not altogether useless at it, I still don't know whether I really want to be a journalist. Sometimes it feels rather cowardly to write about stuff other people do, rather than getting your own butt on the line. However, it seems this sentiment is not unheard of amongst journalists, so perhaps I'm simply fitting in really nicely.
|
12:08 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Monday, January 1, 2007
Taking a bloody hint |
|
The Dasselaars are a stubborn breed. I remember my grandfather on my mother's side regularly engaging in fierce verbal clashes on birthday parties when he was right about something. Or thought he was, though in the mind of a Dasselaar this is precisely the same thing. My father is even worse, but fortunately, this also means he'll shrug when he reads this as he'll be convinced I'm wrong.
I freely admit my character bears the strains of this double genetic burden.
This is perhaps why it sometimes takes an ax to chop off a slice of cheese in the Dasselaar Fungal Cabin. For example, Edwin sent me a Christmas card stating:
'Ik wens je een slecht jaar, in zaken tenminste, zodat je meer tijd over houdt voor jezelf.'
Or, in English for all you imperialist Yankees not conversant in Dutch: 'I wish you a bad 2007, as far as your business is concerned, so more time will remain to do personal stuff.'
Gee, where did I hear that before? Well, perhaps in May 2005, when Najia mailed me: 'Maybe streamlining your ambitions in the proper path is exactly what you need to stop exchanging too much of your valuable time for money. I'd say grant yourself some quality time and think.'
They're right, of course (see, that wasn't too hard, Arjan, was it?). 2006 was an excellent year, business wise (no, you won't get a pony). Furthermore, I completed an MA degree. Oh, and I barely slept. At all.
There's more stuff I could do than I can do. So it makes sense to prioritize and opt for those ventures that appeal to me the most. Of course, some of them will be those in which I 'exchange time for money', if only because I actually enjoy my work.
But perhaps here, too, it's time to start making choices. For example, there are a few business ideas I have wanted to test for a long time. 2007 seems like the time for it.
Then there's this one thing I really, really, really want to do. I told you so last year. Now, if someone could perhaps email me that brilliant opening sentence that popped in my head at 4AM when I was clear enough to think but too indolent to get out of bed and grab a pen?
Good intentions generally last until the 28th of January, so check back with me in four weeks or so.
Happy New Year!
(PS: Here's one good intention I've already followed up on: making frequent backups. But that's probably because the Mozy service is both free and automatic (and the referrer is in there to get me even more free storage space - hey, less money spent = more time left to finish that novel).
|
15:03 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Tuesday, November 28, 2006
No man is a hero to his subeditor |
|
But Bert van Rijswijk, a subeditor at news weekly Elsevier, was a hero to me. Sort of. When I first came to Elsevier as an intern back in 1997, a cocky kid feeling rather out of his depth being in a building with some of the best journalists in the country, he put me at ease.
Bert was a wonderful human being.
So of course God, in his infinite wisdom, decided to bring the guy home. Nice work, God. Couldn't you at least have comforted him a bit before taking him in?
|
10:45 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Saturday, November 25, 2006
For (absent) friends |
|
Yesterday night, we had a little party in Tig Barra, an Irish pub in Amsterdam, to celebrate the fact that Leiden University no longer has to deal with a bothersome student. To all of you who were there, and to all who wanted to be there but couldn't make it: thanks for a wonderful evening.
Now, back to my Lemsip.
|
21:06 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Monday, November 13, 2006
Party time |
|
On Friday, November 24th, I'll host a little graduation party in an Irish pub in Amsterdam.
I've already sent out quite a few invitations, but if you haven't received one yet and feel I must have forgotten you (or a spam filter interceded unwarrantedly) please drop me a line. The address is somewhere else on this page.
Beer, wine and minerals will be free from 1800-2300 or at whatever time my funds run dry.
Those of you who don't live in the Netherlands: email me anyway, as all invites until now have been directed at Dutch nationals.
|
22:43 |
permalink comment(s) (1) trackback(s) (0)
|
Sunday, November 12, 2006
Friday, September 8, 2006
Sunday, August 27, 2006
In case you were wondering |
|
I have spent, and to some extent still am spending, quite a bit of time trying to finish my MA degree. Attempting to graduate can be detrimental to one's blogging habits, especially if one is taking part in a fulltime course, and running a fulltime business as well.
The good news is that I will graduate on September 8. Information about my final grade as well as, much more importantly, my graduation party, open to anyone who wishes to come and is of good spirits, will be posted here.
As will my MA thesis, which is written in English and deals with the journalistic aspects of the Dutch blogosphere. It would not have existed if not for nearly 400 Dutch bloggers who offered up valuable spare time to take part in a survey whose results make up a large part of the thesis. (Note to academic readers: all survey data of participants who have agreed to waive their right to anonimity will be made available to bonafide researchers on request.)
Still, some final bits and pieces need to be filled in. So, for now, I will keep quiet.
Stay tuned, and expect more news, and the thesis, very soon.
|
19:12 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Friday, May 26, 2006
Saturday, May 20, 2006
Nog 761 webloggers nodig |
|
Aan het onderzoek naar het journalistieke gehalte van weblogs is massaal meegedaan. Maar om het doel te halen, hebben we nog van minstens 761 webloggers hun mening nodig. Lees hier meer over het onderzoek, of vul het hier gelijk in.
|
11:03 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Tuesday, May 16, 2006
On leaving the Netherlands |
|
Several American readers have suggested that, in the wake of the AHA affair, I consider moving to the United States as well.
I'm not quite ready to do that - yet. I just bought a house here and, apart from the fact that I actually would like to live there for a while, I am legally bound not to sell it until it's finished, somewhere in late 2007.
But I had already decided to start taking part in Green Card lotteries, and will also keep an eye out for jobs in the USA that come available at the companies I work for in the Netherlands.
|
9:12 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Monday, May 15, 2006
Unsatisfied readers, please don't email me |
|
It's only to save you from further disappointment. I will most likely not be able to meet your expectations. I am sorry for that. I work about 80 hours a week, run my own company and am pursuing an MA thesis. I have taken about four days off in the past year and a half, so I may not have time to blog about the very same thing Pieter Dorsman already writes about at his excellent Peaktalk.
I apologize for being so selfish that at those rare occassions when I have time to fill my blog, I sometimes choose to write about personal affairs, so I can keep in touch with people I don't get to see very often. I hope Saint Peter will have mercy on me when I stand at the pearly gates some day. Perhaps the six Canada and America-based journalists whom I helped pro bono with their stories about Van Gogh and Islam in the Netherlands in the past few years, none of whom ever sent a thank you note, will speak up for me then, though it may be a good thing that being dead I'll be way past holding my breath.
It may also happen that I defend the freedom of speech of someone I don't fully agree with. If this person is holding opinions similar to your own, please accept my unreserved apologies for not writing exactly what you would have written if you hadn't been so lazy or cowardly to forego starting your own blog. I subsequently accept full responsibility for adhering to Voltaire's adage about defending someone's freedom of speech being especially important when you don't agree with that person.
Also, please accept my humblest apologies for blogging for free, rather than demanding donations or organizing annual/monthly/weekly 'pledge drives'. Should the contents of Zacht Ei nevertheless not be to your satisfaction, please be sure to contact me so we can work out a way for me to make amends. I suggest a scheme in which I will cut your grass with a nail clipper once for every time I let you down. Alternatively, you could perhaps sell one of my kidneys. Hey, I'm giving you a free piece of my mind already.
Finally, I am afraid I am too morally corrupt to be able to adequately respond to charges of anti-Americanism or spiritual retardation. After all, I only drove to an American war cemetery once last year, which still left me three days off I could have used less selfishly. I humly bow to your profound assessment of my mental valor, and can only hope to one day rise to a greatness of the kind that you, my dear unsatisfied reader, have already achieved.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go vomit.
|
18:38 |
permalink comment(s) (4) trackback(s) (0)
|
Sunday, May 14, 2006
Saturday, May 13, 2006
Yay, I've got a new neighbor at Heer Halewijnstraat 20 - I |
|
He lives in the apartment directly above me, and yesterday night he decided to redecorate his floor, and at the same time, fix my toilet which lies directly below his now also defunct bathroom.
It was a lot of hard work, but the result sure looks good.
And yes, those are lumps of concrete, not kitty litter.
Update March 31, 2007: He's put his house at Heer Halewijnstraat 20 - I on sale. Good riddance. I just hope the new guy or gal will be more civilized and perhaps even doing me the favor of walking on his hardwood floor, rather than thumping around like Captain Kangaroo on steroids.
|
10:51 |
permalink comment(s) (1) trackback(s) (0)
|
Thursday, May 11, 2006
Doe mee aan een groot onderzoek naar weblogs |
|
** THIS IS A STICKY POST INTENDED SOLELY FOR DUTCH PEOPLE - SORRY, REMAINING 6 BILLION EARTHLINGS - PLEASE SCROLL DOWN TO SEE MORE RECENT UPDATES **
Heb je een weblog? Ben je benieuwd of wat je daarop doet, als journalistiek gezien kan worden of niet? Anders wij wel. De Vereniging van Onderzoeksjournalisten en de Universiteit Leiden doen onderzoek naar het journalistieke gehalte van weblogs, in het kader van de Master-scriptie van joors troelie. Als je het afgelopen jaar minimaal één bericht op je weblog hebt geplaatst (vaker mag, uiteraard), willen we jouw mening weten.
Hoe meer webloggers meedoen, hoe betrouwbaar het onderzoek, dus vraag ook je mede-webloggers om de enquete in te vullen. Die vind je op http://onderzoek.zachtei.nl. Onder de deelnemers worden tien exemplaren van het Handboek Digitale Criminaliteit verloot.
Het verbatim kopiëren van dit postje wordt sterk aangemoedigd - we zijn nog ver verwijderd van het benodigde aantal proefpersonen.
|
0:53 |
permalink comment(s) (1) trackback(s) (0)
|
Saturday, April 8, 2006
Monday, April 3, 2006
Romance isn't dead |
|
Briefest summary of why I became a journalist I've ever read, but it's spot on.
We are not always a happy lot, being restless, easily bored, and unable to bear routine.
Said Fred, whose life seems nevertheless to have taken a slightly more, er, florid turn than mine.
This world needs more Kerouacs.
|
22:16 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Friday, March 24, 2006
A big decision |
|
Remeber the house I couldn't get? Turns out I can get it after all. The previous candidate apparently wasn't able to arrange financing.
This is the house which costs 289,000 euros (that's nearly 350,000 US Dollars). Any remarks about why I should(n't) go through with this are more than welcome.
|
10:55 |
permalink comment(s) (4) trackback(s) (0)
|
Friday, February 17, 2006
Why you should hurt the ones you love |
|
Sullivan tells it best:
So why my recent concentration on the far right? It's pretty simple: they're in power. They control all branches of government and a hefty chunk of the media. They deserve to. They did all this legitimately and democratically. But, in my book, that means an independent writer should concentrate more on that extreme right now, while not ignoring the other, because they're the ones running the country. I guess I'm also more angered by the right these days because I care more about conservatism than about liberalism. It's my philosophy, damnit, which means I get more upset when I see it desecrated or abandoned.
There's a lot more I agree with my father on than I used to when I was 18, which I'm being told is one of the annoying but inevitable consequences of getting older. But there's one important exception to that rule. When I was 18, the church I was a member of nearly got torn apart by internal turmoil. My father lambasted the local press for which I worked at the time, for reporting about it. He couldn't understand why, as he put it, one 'would want to soil his own nest'.
That, of course, is a rhetorical reversal of what's really going on in such cases. Our job as journalists is indeed not to litter the place. That would be manufacturing news (and yes, I know that, unfortunately, some 'journalists' will have no qualms about doing it anyway.) But when someone else has dumped dirt all over a place people care about, it's our job - no, our duty - to tell the story to as many people as possible.
People may not always like to hear the world isn't as perfect as they'd like it to be. But the only way to come closer to that lofty goal is to be told as often as possible what issues still need remedying.
|
19:46 |
permalink comment(s) (2) trackback(s) (0)
|
Tuesday, February 14, 2006
Request to my readers |
|
I am not in the habit of asking for money, but may I ask that, if you enjoy this blog, you visit my tech blog PMM Blognoot once in a while, and perhaps start to use it as your homepage? The friendly people at Planet Internet, of which PMM Blognoot is a part, are kind enough to pay me for my blogging, which in turn enables me to spend time on Zacht Ei. It seems only fair that they would get some extra pageviews as a result. We're doing pretty good already and indeed traffic is at an all-time high, but I feel we can do excellent, and so that's what I wish to aim for. I also would ask that you forward the URL to PMM Blognoot (www.pmmblognoot.nl) to any of your friends with some grasp of Dutch.
Alternatively, sending a winning lottery ticket to my postal address is also much appreciated. (Or barring that, real Jelly Belly beans.)
|
18:28 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Sunday, February 5, 2006
Friday, January 27, 2006
Hail Jack Bauer |
|
I'm not a Wienerite but '24' is very much art. No, not the script, which is nothing we haven't seen before - just more of it compressed into a smaller timeframe. But anyone who has ever handled a camera can do nothing but admire the brilliant cinematography which is more innovative than anything I've seen since Armageddon (feel free to disagree with me, but anyone who can shoot a coherent if highly contentless movie with shots that have an average length of 1.5 seconds is innovative to me). I'm not sure how many takes they have to do for every scene, but it seems like an absolute nightmare to direct/film/edit this kind of stuff. Add to that the minimalist music, which is not exceptional but nevertheless exceptionally effective, and you get the best thriller series ever. Period.
(Oh, and on a less than intellectual level: does anybody else think Jack finally got some well-deserved recognition (from Audrey, from Derek, and from CTU) in Monday's episode?)
|
13:55 |
permalink comment(s) (2) trackback(s) (0)
|
Tuesday, January 24, 2006
Sunday, January 22, 2006
Numbers |
|
I'm not trying to sound like a bad episode of Lost here, but the number 13 has been rather instrumental to my life. Literally. I was born on Friday the 13th, 1975. According to family lore, the superstitious nurse wanted to change my date of birth into Thursday the 12th, since I was born only fifteen (or is that thirteen?) minutes after midnight. My protestant father wanted none of it. One day I'll release a book full of jokes about Friday the 13th. Lord knows I've heard enough of them. Thanks, dad.
Anyway, the number keeps on popping up. Now I've registered to buy a house in Amsterdam (it's this one, in case you're interested). As is often the case with new houses in Amsterdam, they are distributed through a lottery system. I got my ticket number in the mail yesterday. No prizes for guessing what it is.
|
11:36 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Monday, January 9, 2006
Sunday, January 1, 2006
Happy New Year |
|
So after the obligatory best wishes (best wishes!) I'd really like to ask you about what's in store for you this year. And I'm not talking your plans to quit smoking/be nicer to your dog/finally divorce that **** ******* **** (m/f).
Just to get you started: a friend of mine is off to Guatemala in a probably highly successful attempt to bankrupt himself. And I've got some interesting choices to face as well:
• Will I finally write a novel... I've always wanted to write fiction, but thusfar I've been too scared to make the attempt. In 2004, I told my publisher I would write a novel after my second nonfiction book had been finished. So it seems I've run out of excuses, now that I've finished three nonfiction books and contributed to a fourth.
• ...and if so, will I write it in English? My books are doing quite well - for Dutch standards. The average book in the Netherlands, I'm told, sells 800 (!) copies. I've had no trouble exceeding that (many times over) thusfar. That's nonfiction. Writing a novel in Dutch is a recipe for poverty. Then again, I am not a native speaker of English, so I'd need a subeditor. Preferably someone with a working knowledge of Dutch, a sense of humor, and an intimate knowledge of the neurotic behavior any journalist is bound to display from time to time. Any takers?
|
20:06 |
permalink comment(s) (3) trackback(s) (0)
|
Sunday, December 25, 2005
Christmas wishes |
|
I got these from a befriended attorney at law:
Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, our best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress, non-addictive, gender neutral, celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice, or secular practices of your choice, with respect for the religious/secular persuasions and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all and a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling, and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2006, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make Europe great, (not to imply that Europe is necessarily greater than any other continent) and without regard to the race, creed, color, age, physical ability, religious faith, choice of computer platform, or sexual preference of the wishee.
|
21:12 |
permalink comment(s) (1) trackback(s) (0)
|
Monday, December 19, 2005
Sunday, December 18, 2005
Britain compared to Iraq under Saddam |
|
Another gem from the journalism textbook I have to plough through. The following snippets are from an article written by Justin Lewis and Rod Brookes, on British reporting on the war against Iraq:
'A number of reports (19 per cent) referred to the decadent nature of the regime (...). While most of these reports contained evidence that was unremarkable for a dictatorial regime (indeed, since Britain has one of the wealthiest monarchies and one of the highest levels of inequality in Europe, the charges of decadence were particularly curious), we found no reports that made this point, or put them in an international context.'
But wait, it gets better. From one of the final paragraphs:
'Our research suggests that the (UK, ed.) wartime coverage was generally sympathetic to the government's case. This manifested itself in various ways, notably: (...) the focus on the brutality or decadence of the regime without putting this evidence in context.'
I've got your context right here.
Update 14.11:
Further on in the textbook, there's an article by Teun van Dijk. Who, you say? Well, his website not only gives some insight into his outlook on the world, but also proudly displays this picture:
Granted, not a Ché T-shirt in sight.
|
11:35 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Saturday, December 17, 2005
Life imitates Monty Python |
|
From the journalism textbook I have to read for next week's exam:
'A strong tradition in the sociology of journalism has emphasised the controlling, socially reproductive functions of news - its role in the ideological appartus of capitalist societies, binding together an unequal and exploitative social system through the promulgation of a world-view which is consistent with the maintenance of dominant class interests.'
From Monty Python's Search for the Holy Grail's dialogue between King Arthur and Dennis the Peasant:
DENNIS: Oh king, eh, very nice. And how'd you get that, eh? By exploiting the workers -- by hanging on to outdated imperialist dogma which perpetuates the economic and social differences in our society! If there's ever going to be any progress--
|
11:58 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Thursday, December 15, 2005
No, I am not dead |
|
But thanks for asking.
I am, however, extremely busy, because my company has to meet deadlines, I have to take exams between now and Christmas to get my MA degree, I've got a publisher breathing down my neck about a deadline for the revised edition of my book on internet research, and on top of that, I got infected with a nasty virus about two weeks ago which resulted in rather annoying problems with my left arm (I'll spare you the details; suffice it to say it's finally healing now - thank you, pharmaceutical companies and Dr. Boyraz - yes, I've got a Turkish GP and she rules). The latter wasn't just highly unpleasant in terms of pain, it also took up a lot of time I didn't have to begin with.
I'll stop my whining now. But if you were wondering why I've been a tad quiet, this is why.
Update 22.37: I'm not too busy though to express my happiness about three things: the way president Bush has been straightforward about mistakes that have been made; the very likely adoption of the McCain Amendment, and the extremely high turnout in today's elections in Iraq. Today was a good day for freedom.
|
9:33 |
permalink comment(s) (2) trackback(s) (0)
|
Thursday, November 24, 2005
We're go |
|
In the next three weeks, Urbanesque will be a training ground for 19 journalism students. They are attempting to write articles for a girl's magazine. I'd say: give them your support, even if you're not fluent in Dutch. (This would be a great opportunity to brush up on ye olde language skills!)
Don't forget to add their rss feed.
|
23:26 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Wednesday, November 23, 2005
No content yet |
|
At Urbanesque.nl, the website my journalism students will be posting their first stories to, starting Thursday night. I'm giving you the URL now, so (a) you'll be prepared and might even decide to add the RSS feed to your reader (b) Google will start crawling it, ensuring maximum exposure. After all, a journalist without readers is like a soundless tree falling in the forest. Or whatever.
Many thanks go out to Marleen Zachte for helping me solving some Movable Type template issues, and to Paul Jongsma for assorted technical difficulties. (Dealing with them, I mean, rather than causing them.)
|
21:09 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Wednesday, November 16, 2005
Finally |
|
Someone takes that Kundera drivel apart.
If there's one thing that turns me off on a date, aside from hearing 'My visit to the STD clinic went real well' after having asked about her day, it's yet another 20-something girl/woman having judged 'The unbearable lightness of Kundera being' by its cover (of the anamorphic dvd release).
(Includes a reading list with alternatives.)
|
20:16 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Sunday, November 6, 2005
Wanted: a PD150 or PD170 |
|
If any of you guys know of someone who has a second-hand Sony PD150 or PD170 for sale (I'll settle for a HVR-Z1E too) and wants to get rid of it cheaply (or give it away in appreciation for all the hours I put in blogging ;-)) please drop me a line. I'll need an invoice, so don't steal anything on my behalf (unless you manage steal some company letterhead paper as well). Preferably it would be a complete kit, containing a filming floodlight, a wireless XLR mic, another mic for me to wear, and some extra batteries as well. If that person has an editing computer (or laptop) to sell containing a Matrox RT-X100 pci card, that's fine too.
(Oh, and while you're at it, get me an affordable house with a garden in the city centre. Yes, I know I'm being ridiculous.)
In case you were wondering: I am training to be a camera journalist and am in desperate need of both equipment and more experience. The two, in this case, are intertwined for practicising without a camera is rather cumbersome, though amusing for casual observers. Perhaps I should charge.
|
18:47 |
permalink comment(s) (2) trackback(s) (0)
|
Sunday, October 23, 2005
Brilliant |
|
If you have never been in a relationship, then 'Closer' serves as a harbinger of things that are inevitable to come.
If you have been in a relationship, then 'Closer' might just offer a catharsis of past grief.
'Closer' is definitely not a film for those looking for a date and/or chick flick. It is, however, a brutally honest look at the inadequacies of love, and I for one was happier for seeing it.
(BTW: playing Morissey's 'How soon is now' in the background during the 'club scene' was a nice touch.)
|
1:49 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Saturday, October 22, 2005
Thank you |
|
For your continued support of this blog. Google saw fit to bestow a PageRank upgrade to me (from 5 to 6). This wouldn't have happened if you hadn't continued to visit and link to this blog.
Thank you, once more.
|
11:14 |
permalink comment(s) (1) trackback(s) (0)
|
Friday, October 14, 2005
Thursday, October 13, 2005
Modern didactics |
|
Yet another late night due to combining my well-paid journalism gigs (see further down), my job as a university lecturer and my attempts to get an MA degree at the same university, so what's there to do for a healthy Dutch guy but to order take-out.
So I'm waiting for my bag of chips, and the friendly middle-aged Egyptian guy behind the counter asks me what I'm up to these days. I tell him about my academic engagements.
'You know, I used to teach in high school back in Egypt.'
'Oh? Did you enjoy it as much as...'
'I hated it. How do you manage to keep order?'
'Well, I've got a pretty big mouth...'
'You mean you don't want to hit them?'
'Er...'
'Back in Egypt, I wasn't allowed to yell at them or hit them.'
'Oh...'
'I don't mean whacking them. Just a slap to correct them when they're out of line.'
Needless to say, I've put his suggestions on the agenda for the next faculty meeting.
|
23:25 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Cooking the graphics |
|
Tonight Claude Cookman of Indiana University gave a lecture at Leiden University on the proper use of infographics in journalism. His slides are not available online, however, he seems to have a pretty comprehensive website.
Of course, if you want to check out some infographics, you may want to go to this website by Kay Coenen.
|
22:18 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Wednesday, October 12, 2005
Tuesday, October 11, 2005
They may cause brain damage after all |
|
'Hi this is Arjan. Can you please call me back at 020 686 08 04 or 06 45 190 < mute >'
And I halted mid-sentence, all of a sudden having forgotten what the rest of my cell phone number was.
(It's 498, in case you were interested.)
|
21:29 |
permalink comment(s) (1) trackback(s) (0)
|
Monday, October 10, 2005
Jalapeno insomnia |
|
According to weekly Elsevier, eating lots of jalapenos helps one sleep at night.
Must be why I crashed about two hours before my normal bedtime yesterday night after eating a very spicy pizza, only to wake up at about 2.30 AM and spend the next three hours exploring various sides of my bed (FYI: there are four) before drifting off again. Fortunately, the gardener decided this morning was perfect to start trimming the lawn at 7AM, though I only needed to get up at 9...
Thanks, Elsevier!
|
11:33 |
permalink comment(s) (1) trackback(s) (0)
|
Sunday, October 9, 2005
Saturday, October 8, 2005
Tuesday, September 27, 2005
Sunday, September 25, 2005
Saturday, September 24, 2005
What I've been up to |
|
Working my behind off, as the colloquialism goes. Teaching a BA course, following an MA course, and running one's own company leave little time for anything else. Fortunately, my teachers (and colleagues) are wonderful people: the kind of phlegmatic, inquisitive, open-minded fellows you'd hope to find at every university (if only).
The rest of the university is, of course, a bureaucratic mess. I've been working there for a month and still don't have a contract, so at the moment I survive on food stamps (just kidding). Ender, my cat, is having a hard time making the transition. He's used to me being at home almost all the time. Now, I'm suddenly gone four days a week. He ate the flowers I got as a present for completing the Dam to Dam run.
That's right, I completed the 10 mile run last Sunday. My time was 1.28.02, which is better than I'd expected, but not as good as I'd hoped. The fact that the first 5 kilometres took me more time than the last 5 indicates it was rather busy: about 30,000 people participated. Add to that the fact that some of the streets we had to go through were quite narrow, and you can imagine there were a few bottlenecks en route.
Anyway, here's some pictures from my Garmin running watch:
That's it for now. I may post a rant about the Dutch healthcare system later this weekend, as a survey amongst expats living here generally disprove of Dutch GP's (and rightfully so), but then again, I may not. I've exceeded several deadlines and I will try to do some catching up this weekend.
|
10:03 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Saturday, September 10, 2005
What a week |
|
Find some new pictures of my fellow MA students here.
Off to bed now. Got to finish reading the proofs of my new book tomorrow, as well as prepare two 3,000 word stories this weekend and read about 200 pages of stuff on rhetorical and argumentation theory, as well as mass communication studies.
|
2:12 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Tuesday, September 6, 2005
Why I've been so quiet |
|
It's the opening of the semester at Leiden University and that means full-time attendance. This leaves very little room for normal wastes of time, such as blogging, kicking the cat and buying decent food. Especially when you're trying to run a business on the side and have to proofread your book. From next week onwards, things may very well return to some kind of normalcy as the regular class schedule kicks in.
Meanwhile, here are some of my fellow students.
Yes, I'm in there somewhere. /me is the guy who desperately needs a haircut and some sleep. The fact that my complexion seems normal is due to two successive Photoshop treatments.
Never let it be said again that technology is a corrupting influence.
Even though Leiden University saw fit to bestow the following unforgettable (and unforgivable) email address upon me: a.j.j.dasselaar.2.SPAMMERSGOTOHELL@umail.leidenuniv.nl, and no, I didn't make the number 2 up.
|
21:38 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Saturday, September 3, 2005
Comments are off, for the moment |
|
A very persistent trackback spammer who apparently uses a botnet keeps on bugging me. Since I can't disable trackbacks completely (except by editing every single article), I have to block all IPs. If someone has a better solution, please contact me by email.
|
11:15 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Thursday, September 1, 2005
Pray |
|
I abandoned my Christian faith on the age of 19. Reading Thomas Aquinas ('Faith cannot contradict reason'), and to a lesser extent René Descartes, played an integral part in that process, which is all the more ironic since they both remained Christians until their respective deaths (although Descartes may have done that more to please those around him).
Nevertheless, I still understand the power of prayer, or meditation if you like. And I was reminded of that when I saw an episode from the series Babylon 5, in which station commander Jeffrey Sinclair has to introduce the concept of 'Earth religion' to a host of alien races.
So he guides the representatives of said races to a room where there's a line of people. And Sinclair starts to introduce them all:
'This is Mr. Harris. He's an atheist. Father Frisanti, a Roman Catholic. Mr. Hayakawa, a Zen Buddhist. Mr. Rashid, a Muslim. Mr. Rosenthal, an Orthodox Jew. Running Elk, of the Oglala Sioux faith. Father Papapolous, a Greek Orthodox. Ojijiko, of the Ebo tribe. Ochukiak, a Utic Eskimo. Sawa, of the Jivaro tribe. Ms. N'fuma, a Bantu. Ms. Chang, a Taoist. Mr. Blacksmith, an Aborigine. Ms. Yamamoto, a Shinto. Ms. Nigel, a Maori. Mr. Go, a Hindu...'
And his voice fades out as Sinclair continues to introduce more and more people, and more and more perspectives on God, to the baffled representatives.
Whenever I see that scene, I feel closer to whatever God is than I ever did when I still went to church.
|
0:31 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Tuesday, August 30, 2005
Subsidize a writer, tell me what to read! |
|
My book list for my MA degree came in today, and guess what: three books on the list contain the word 'dialectical'. Wake up and smell the reductionist garlic.
Upon further examination, it turned out to be slightly less bad than I had feared, as all books deal with a form of argumentation theory, invented by Frans van Eemeren, called the 'pragma-dialectical approach'.
Because I want to keep my reputation as a genuine smartass, I'd like to read some counterpoints as well. I've already bothered one rather unsuspecting philosophy professor tonight, but I figured: why stop there when I can bother about 2,000 people more.
(Especially since one of the first pdf thingies that came up when I googled 'pragma-dialectical approach' was an article by a British Ph.D. student who used Van Eemeren's theories to point out that everyone who doesn't agree with his view that Western society consists of imperialist maniacs is a racist using foul rhetorical tricks to disguise hate speech; said Ph. D student of course being completely free of any rhetorical missteps himself.)
I'm sure there are a few smart people out there reading this, so do your worst and provide me with a book list from hell.
(To offer some further encouragement: we'll get to critique Michael Moore this semester...)
|
0:51 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Sunday, August 28, 2005
Saturday, August 27, 2005
Autumn |
|
Living near Schiphol Airport, you can tell when summer is leaving. It departs with some measure of style, as the normally small vapor trails of jet engines widen considerably, then vanish.
I love autumn. Nature disappears, but slowly, like the sounds in a composition of Toru Takemitsu. The essence of music, as John Williams once said, is in its dying away. In finality there is beauty.
I told my cat about this, and he purred.
|
9:38 |
permalink comment(s) (1) trackback(s) (0)
|
Wednesday, August 24, 2005
The infinite improbability of love |
|
One of the things I liked most about Douglas Adams and his Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is how he used absurdity to confront its readers with very real phenomena.
Thus he conjured up a 'biro planet', a place where all those ballpoints you've lost over the years have gone.
He invented an entire race of foul-smelling aliens to mock bureaucrats.
And he made his main character, Arthur Dent, lose the girl he's smitten with to the president of the galaxy, a guy with two heads and a spaceship.
That's one case when an Aston Martin keychain isn't going to do you much good.
I took the afternoon off today to see the film, and boy, was I in favor of the death penalty for movie producers afterwards.
Arthur Dent gets the girl.
In the book he never did get anywhere with Trillian, and with good reason. If Adams' infinite improbability drive ever did anything, it was to make the probable seem even more probable by making it look so improbable it became impossible to ignore.
I'm sure everyone over 14 knows this already, but unlike what Hollywood would have you believe, true love is something that is very improbable.
That's why, when Arthur finally met Fenchurch, Adams wrote their story with so much absurdity that even a cynic such as myself could accept it.
Adams did not, however, make Arthur smack Trillian after she had PMS'd for half the film whether to choose the exciting-but-unreliable guy or the boring-but-at-least-very-understanding guy.
The people who made this atrocity understand neither life, the universe nor the rest.
Now go say that 42 times fast.
|
21:21 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Sunday, August 21, 2005
Cloning, good for you |
|
As I'll be joining the ranks of those we affectionately refer to as 'wage slaves' in the Netherlands, I spent an hour this morning brushing up my resume. Yes, just another week or so and I'll officially be a lecturer (or assistant professor, or whatever they call it in English) at Leiden University. As well as a student, as I'll be studying to get my master's degree at the same time I'll be teaching undergraduates. It's going to be, er, interesting. Especially on September 8, when I have classes as a master's student, but need to give a presentation with Rob Punselie for a group of bachelor students at the very same time. Does JK Rowling have one of these on loan?
(Oh, don't worry, I'll keep on freelancing. I will only teach one class a week, and who needs sleep, anyway?)
|
10:05 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Saturday, August 20, 2005
Blow, blow, blow your boat |
|
Martijn and I went to SAIL yesterday, during which Martijn gave me the idea to buy a boat of my own.
As (a) we didn't get blown up by Al Qaeda, and (b) the whole 'cruising around the world' thing has sort of appealed to me ever since I met an American in Wellington, New Zealand, who had been doing exactly that for the past twenty years, I spent the morning looking at ships rather than finishing an article on why the battery life on your cellphone always seems to suck.
Thanks, Martijn. Next time, I'll tell people how you kept on stroking the silky ribbon of my press accreditation pass as if you were in desperate need of a girlfriend. (Yes, yes, I know, I need one too, but the hookers in Amsterdam won't give me credit anymore, and I hate washing dishes.)
I'll be back at SAIL tomorrow, when hopefully the weather won't suck as much, to make avail of all the press freebies, such as touring the harbour in special press ships which are loaded with booze and food.
Meanwhile, I'd welcome sensible advice regarding decent ocean worthy boats, and how to learn to sail them properly. Sailing on a sweet water lake, fine. Sailing in the midst of a storm on the Atlantic, I'd probably be in over my head right now.
|
11:22 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Friday, August 19, 2005
Monday, August 15, 2005
Bands of freedom (Dutch readers only) |
|
Ik moet niets hebben van de oranje 'respect'-armbandjes, die gode zij dank het straatbeeld hier niet zo verpesten als ik van tevoren had gevreesd.
Maar waar ik al langere tijd naar zocht, was een manier om steun te betuigen aan de (ook Nederlandse) troepen die in Irak en Afghanistan goed werk hebben gedaan, en in veel gevallen nog steeds doen. En dan graag niet al te schreeuwerig, à la 'America Fuck Yeah'. Ik heb een hekel aan Michael Moore, maar net zo goed aan soortgelijke retoriek van de rechtervleugel. Bovendien is Amerika van de westerse landen weliswaar degene die de zwaarste klappen opvangt, maar niet het enige.
Iets neutralers dus, met 'vrijheid', zocht ik.
Nou, zulke armbandjes zijn er ook. Probleempje is alleen dat ze uit de Verenigde Staten moeten komen, en per verpakking van 10 stuks worden verstuurd. Dat ga ik dan maar doen, maar in tegenstelling tot sommige Hindoe-goden heb ik 'slechts' twee armen. Ik heb er dus geen tien nodig.
Wie doet er mee?
Lezers die er eentje willen, kunnen zich melden op jageilzonarmbandje (at) zachtei.nl.
Kosten zijn 1 euro per stuk (= 1 dollar plus aandeel in verzendkosten), afhalen in Amsterdam, of per post voor 1,50 euro.
Ik wacht tot vrijdag met bestellen, dus je opgeven kan tot en met donderdag.
|
23:09 |
permalink comment(s) (1) trackback(s) (0)
|
On sociologists and their inaptitude at maths |
|
Meet Peter Swanborn. Peter is considered to be quite the expert at methodologies of sociological research. Peter is also the author of the manual for research methodologies ('Basisboek sociaal onderzoek') on which I will have an oral exam on Thursday.
Boy, is the professor in for a treat.
I've been annoyed by Swanborn's book ever since he failed to differentiate between a theory, a theorem and a hypothesis in chapter 1 (he sets things right later on, but that's too late to my taste), and doesn't distinguish between a 'causality problem' and an 'explanation problem' (proving cause and effect can be done without offering any explanation whatsoever - in the end it turns out 'explanation' is just his phrase for 'causality').
It took me until the final chapter, however, to conclude that this book needs a dramatic overhaul.
It's not just that Swanborn can't be bothered to look up the name of famous statistician Maurice Kendall, who is adressed as Kandall all the way through, or that 'Kandall' is credited with having invented the statistic variable Q, which was the work of George Udny Yule. Kendall invented a method to calculate rank correlation coefficients, which is known as the variable Tau.
I can forgive that. After all, 'q' and 'tau' are only a few letters apart in the alphabet. Granted, they're two altogether different alphabets, one being the Latin version, the other one being the Greek, but hey, Rome wasn't burnt down on one day.
However, it's when he starts doing math when I find myself unable from trying to claw my own eyes out.
Here's one example, from page 275:
'(213/212) / (221/334) = (213/212) * (334/221), or 213 * (334/212) * 221 = 1,52'
What he means, of course, is:
'(213/212) / (221/334) = (213/212) * (334/221), or (213*334) / (212*221) = 1,52'
Mind you, this is the 'fourth, completely revised edition'. Obviously, the revision process at 'Boom' Publishing House ('Boom' means tree, which is a pity, because after reading this book, I feel they might benefit from a huge explosion) is managed by people who graduated summa cum laude in French reductionist mathematics, which teaches that calculations which yield correct results are examples of neodialectic western cultural imperialism, or something to that effect. Either that, or they're retards.
Anyone who can't spot the error in said calculation is kindly requested not to come near me, at least not tonight, unless you're Scarlett Johansson, or a clone thereof.
(Note: for clarity reasons I've added parentheses in the transcription of the calculation above. Swanborn doesn't bother with them, he just hits the space key a few more times. Also, I've substituted 'x' with '*'. Sure, any first year student should know you don't use 'x' for multiplying since it's also the most common variable in existence, but we're dealing with a sociologist here.)
Nitpickers can click 'Lees verder' for some additional information.
More...
|
21:31 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Saturday, August 13, 2005
Why 'The Island' is yet another unrealistic Michael Bay movie |
|
Only Mr 'I don't shoot films, just two hour long videoclips' could envisage a world in which we can make an infinite number of copies of Scarlet Johansson, enough for everyone, and still dream up a dystopia.
|
22:08 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (1)
|
Thursday, August 11, 2005
Ah, those memories |
|
I empathize, mate. You'll get over it. I did.
(Only in my case she was a Kiwi girl, and we were walking around in Dublin, and I was way too shy in those days to suggest a trip to Phoenix Park, which was infamous in the middle nineties anyway, and my landlady was a very friendly, but also old-fashioned Catholic Irish woman, so that wasn't an option either.)
Douglas Adams was wrong. Knowing where your towel is isn't nearly as important as always having a twin-sized tent with you.
(Via Tim Blair.)
|
2:55 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Wednesday, August 10, 2005
Why I won't sign up with Pajamas Media |
|
Their offer, of which legally I'm bound not to disclose any details, offers me more money than I currently get from Google Ads. This fact notwithstanding, I won't sign it. I felt reluctant to do so the first time I glanced at it, but couldn't exactly put my finger on the reason why. Ann Althouse, however, just did:
'With BlogAds, you're an independent entrepreneur, with Pajamas, you're more like an employee.'
That's it exactly. The Pajamas deal just feels too fixed, too solid, too secure, too safe, too cramped - too claustrophobic.
Though I am not able to sign up at Blogads - since they didn't accept European blogs when they started, and have now switched to a 'sponsor system' - I'd rather take my chances for the time being.
I wouldn't have taken the risk of quitting a top-notch job at one of the best publications in the Netherlands to start my own company if I were the kind of guy who likes to feel like an employee.
Nevertheless, I'd like to wish both Roger and Charles the best of luck with Pajamas Media. It's good to have as many business models as possible out there.
|
12:23 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Aldi: 1. AH: 0 |
|
A while ago, I realized something terrible. There used to be quite a lot of rather attractive female coeds shopping at my local supermarket, the rather upmarket 'AH'.
In Amsterdam, supermarkets are the places where people pick up dates. It's because of that we use little hand baskets while shopping, so other people can see if there are one or two pieces of meat in it.
But all of a sudden, they were all gone (the coeds, not the pieces of meat).
To my relief, whilst shopping at the rather downmarket 'Aldi' which had just opened a few weeks ago, I found out that's where they all had gone.
My life has a reason, yet again.
|
12:09 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Comments policy, yet again |
|
I am getting really, really tired of this. Apparently it's really hard to disagree without making the issue a personal one. I banned another person this morning for this reason.
Let me repeat it again: I have a zero tolerance policy towards personal attacks in any form, no matter how subdued, subtle or cowardly they are presented. If you have a point to make, make the point, without commenting on aspects of the person you are disagreeing with. And no, doing so indirectly does not make it any less uncivil.
This blog is my house on the internet. I will not have guests that don't behave themselves. Please respect the forum rules.
|
11:35 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Wednesday, August 3, 2005
You don't need to be a moron to work in PR |
|
But it sure seems to help.
Let's just imagine an (entirely fictitious, of course) scenario, in which a journalist for Elsevier, sort of the Dutch 'Newsweek', is working to gather gadgets for a Holiday Season story.
The phone rings, and it's Dennis D., who works for an internationally renowned PR agency.
'Wouldn't it be a good idea for you to do a Top-10 of most popular gadgets,' Dennis asks, presumably having a fairly good idea of some products with which to fill those spots.
I am flabbergasted.
Of course, Dennis. I regularly let PR people do my work for me. All journalists who work for national media do that. Oh, and we take bribes too. Please transfer yours to IBAN NL48PSTB0006164485, BIC PSTBNL21. Gifts are not tax deductible.
Idiot.
|
14:51 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Tuesday, August 2, 2005
Runner's low |
|
I am not sure what's wrong with me, but ever since a rather successful 10 mile run a month ago I've been unable to repeat that achievement. I quite literally collapse after about 5 miles or so. Now I'm relatively new to this business, so I am asking for your advice. Is this a matter of having overexerted myself? An unbalanced diet? More protein, less carbs, or the other way around? Taking creatine, chondroitin, glucosamine or any other kind of supplement? On behalf of my acidic calves (and several other muscles), I thank you.
|
22:30 |
permalink comment(s) (2) trackback(s) (0)
|
Friday, July 29, 2005
Looking for a *good* RSS reader |
|
Suggestions? I've tried NewsGator (memory hog and too slow), Sharp Reader (stopped working all of a sudden despite reinstalling) and RssReader (a complete disaster since it forgets which headers it has already retrieved, so I get a full header list every 15 minutes).
|
22:41 |
permalink comment(s) (1) trackback(s) (0)
|
New comments policy |
|
I've fixed the comments and will use this opportunity to do something which is long overdue: institute a few forum rules.
Some people seem to think the comments section is there to spout bigotry. A while ago there were people who thought it would be a good idea to nuke everything from Jemen to Iran, or, in another case, everything from Trondheim to Gibraltar. Now, I am all in favor of nuking the moon, but that's because (a) it's uninhabited and (b) I really like huge explosions from (c) a safe distance.
Other people like to give their emotions free reign if they run out of arguments. Since I started this blog I've been called such things as a coward (by an American who thought I was too left wing) and a Nazi (by a European who thought I was too right wing). Unfortunately, I still haven't received the brown shirt he promised. How rude.
I run this blog for fun - in fact, despite 2,000 unique visitors a day it only costs me and my hoster money (since he never sends me a bill for exceeding data traffic allowances). That's fine, because this is a hobby. But it also implies that I like this to stay fun.
So here's the new comments policy. I think most reasonable people will feel it's reasonable.
More...
|
22:28 |
permalink |
Taking running seriously |
|
As I am (a) due for a ten mile run in September, and (b) kinda feeling I deserve a big present for working my ass off during the past three years, I figured this would be a nice gift for a running nerd such as myself. Now all I need is a 4 gigabyte flash MP3 player so I don't have to constantly delete and upload new trance files to the 256 mb player I'm using now. Too bad they're not on the market yet.
|
20:50 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Wednesday, July 27, 2005
Tuesday, July 26, 2005
Wednesday, July 20, 2005
Hulp gevraagd! / Help needed! |
|
Wie kan me helpen een Exact for DOS-administratie te converteren naar een normaler systeem? Met 'dank' aan mijn (ex-)boekhouder beschik ik over twee floppies (inderdaad, die antieke dingen), waarvan er een beschadigd was (met wat hulp van Spinrite en de computer van een ander inmiddels gefixt), met daarop een kopie van mijn grootboek. Helaas kan ik de backup niet uitlezen en op internet zoeken naar conversietools levert niets op. Net zomin als mailen naar mijn boekhouder (die 'uiteraard' wel een rekening heeft gestuurd voor de gehandicapte disks).
Hulp zeer welkom! Graag via arjan (at) zachtei.nl.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Who can help me to convert an Exact for DOS file to a slightly more readable format? I'd be much obliged. You can contact me at arjan (at) zachtei.nl
|
16:19 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Sunday, July 17, 2005
Thursday, July 14, 2005
New artwork |
|
When I started my company ISOPEDA nearly three years ago, I was flat broke. Which may have had something to do with the fact that I had spent the preceding seven months getting wasted in such colorful Australian pubs such as the MeatWoolshed. Any and all sober time left was used pursuing fun but useless hobbies such as obtaining a few diving licenses, camping in the Nullarbor, swimming with sharks (well, it swam away real quickly, to be honest) and sea lions, as well as flying a plane to an altitude of 2,000 feet without any qualifications or assistance (but with a really laidback instructor sitting next to me).
Anyway, Joost Mattheij, a former colleague at Elsevier News Weekly knocked up the business cards at the top of the image. I was and am very happy with them, especially since they hardly cost me anything.
But I figured it was time for something a bit more stylish. So Kay Coenen had a go at the spider (the Isopeda montana or Huntsman spider is what ISOPEDA derives its name from) and the result is at the bottom of said image. Today I went to the printer to pick up the result.
I am very happy and promise not to harm any spiders for the rest of my life, or the end of the month, whichever comes first. Which is hopefully the latter, although some spiders might disagree.
Click on the picture to see a highres version, and click on Kay's name in case you need a good designer.
|
17:13 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Friday, July 8, 2005
About a cat and a vet |
|
Tomorrow morning I'll be off for a brief (two night) holiday, but I figured it might be a good idea to put Ender, my cat, in an animal hotel because he's never been alone for more than a night before.
Dierenpension Amsterdam-Noord seemed like a good idea when I visited their website - after all, it is owned by a vet.
A week or so ago I went there to take a look. The parents of the owner were there and they were a delight. I got an extensive tour and got shown some rather large as well as quite small cages for cats to stay in. Ender does not relate well to other cats, so I asked whether it would be possible for him to stay alone in one of the large cages. They said yes, and I made a reservation.
Today I met the vet herself, and it was not a pleasure.
Despite being five minutes earlier than I had agreed with her parents, I immediately got reprimanded for being late.
Things went downhill from there. I asked whether I could put Ender in his cage myself, but she denied that request. She said she would put Ender in his 'hokje' (a Dutch diminitive meaning little cage) herself. Needless to say, this got me worried further. When she refused to explain why she wouldn't let me put him in his cage myself, I'd had enough. I went home, taking Ender with me.
As Jeff Jarvis might say: caveat venditor.
I won't be going there again.
|
17:54 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Tuesday, July 5, 2005
Sunday, July 3, 2005
Sensation White |
|
Really too tired to write much now, so I'll suffice with hyperlinking some photographs of last night's dance event in Amsterdam.
(Insert usual clichés on debauchery, sin city, usw usf.)
Check out Patrick Savalle's blog as well, if not for his rather concise but apt review of the event, then for his ventures into model photography (which are quite good for someone who describes himself as an amateur - mark my words, Savalle is one to watch).
|
15:44 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Saturday, June 25, 2005
Google screws up, announces Google Video prematurely (?) |
|
I just posted a Dutch entry on BlogNoot, but you might be able to figure out the accompanying illustration, which is a screenshot resulting from a possible screwup at Google. Either that, or it's a hoax.
Basically, the screenshot was taken from my RSS reader. It's from Google's blog newsfeed and states Google Video has gone live. (You may need to scroll down a bit for the screenshot.) That's 'live' with real, moving images rather than the stills and transcripts that can be seen now. There's something odd with the date, though. And checking out video.google.com I found nothing had changed yet.
I've already emailed the supposed author at Google but haven't received a reply yet.
Further updates as we get them ;-)
|
0:20 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Thursday, June 23, 2005
Weltherrschaft! |
|
Ran 16,15 kilometres today in 1 hour, 26 minutes. Not bad for a guy who couldn't do the 1 mile run in high school without needing CPR.
Fellow morons who also want to participate in the Damloop, which is a 10 mile run from Amsterdam to Zaandam, are welcome to drop me a line.
|
21:52 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Monday, June 13, 2005
Thursday, June 9, 2005
And that's the second tag list |
|
EU Rota, thanks a bundle. Remind me to back up and give it another go after I've run you over.
1) Number of books I own:
Honest to God, I don't know. I'm guessing in-between 1,000 and 1,500. Most of them are in storage.
2) The last book I bought:
The Fabric of Reality by David Deutsch. Yeah, I'm a fun guy to hang with. It's a good thing hookers are cheap in Amsterdam. Unfortunately, they don't know shit about quantum mechanics.
3) Last book read:
Boy and Going Solo - Roald Dahl
4) On deck soon:
Rational Mysticism - John Horgan
5) Five books that meant a lot to me:
Speaker for the Dead - Orson Scott Card: got me into journalism, in a way. Read it when I was 12.
Ecclesiastes: I'm an agnost, but this sometimes makes me at peace with the universe for, say, about five seconds.
The Red Queen - Matt Ridley: makes you not want to have sex for about a week (ok, an hour). Great after breakups.
Miss Wyoming - Douglas Coupland: a properly written love story with a literary undercurrent, but without an author who is constantly trying to prove how amazingly 'literary' he can be (yes, I am talking about you, Mr. Eggers).
Saying Yes - Jacob Sullum: come on now, a conservative American propagating drugs legalization, using sane arguments? No Dutchman could be expected to resist that!
6) Tag five people and have them put this in their journal:
Rogier
Sirpa (yes, she got the previous one as well, but she's got plenty of time anyway)
Lucas
Bas
Myrtus
|
23:41 |
permalink comment(s) (1) trackback(s) (0)
|
OK, let's get rid of these tag lists |
|
They are starting to pile up, EU Rota sent me one as well, but this one was in my to do list for quite some time already.
Here we go.
Britt is playing tag and I'm it!
1) Total number of films I own on DVD/video:
That would be somewhere around 300, not counting the videos. I don't watch those anyway since my VCR fell down from a 2 meter high storage shelf. Surprisingly, it did not survive.
2) The last film I bought:
The Scent of Green Papayas. Still have to view it though.
3) The last film I watched:
Tora! Tora! Tora! Unless you're asking about cinema, in case the answer would be Sideways (which wasn't released in the Netherlands until this year).
4) Five films that I watch a lot or that mean a lot to me (in no
particular order):
The 25th Hour - impressive, not just because of the haunting shots of Ground Zero, but also because it manages to convey in images what I like about America/Americans: their optimism, their (sometimes quite irritating) belief you can always start over, their sense of community, even (or especially) when home is very far away in a physical sense. (Of course, you Yanks (Southern states included) are still a bunch of arrogant twats, but I love you anyway ;).)
Black Hawk Down - after seeing this movie, I also wanted to be a Ranger and be gored in an African country! I'm kidding, of course, but this movie made me admire the guys who literally put their balls on the line. Making the world safe for democracy turns out to be rather unsafe.
Lost in Translation - lost for words. Let this be my life from now on, please.
Good Will Hunting - that's personal.
Karakter - Definitely the best Dutch movie ever made (not that there's much competition). If you see one foreign language film in your life, let this be the one.
5) Tag 5 people and have them put this in their journal:
EU Rota (hey, he tagged me, only fair to return the favor)
Pieter
Sirpa
Edwin
Michiel
|
22:33 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Friday, June 3, 2005
Thursday, May 26, 2005
Monday, May 23, 2005
Thanks for your donations |
|
I received another donation last night. Thank you for that. This blog is a hobby. I don't expect nor need to make any money with it. That makes me appreciate any contributions you choose to make all the more.
|
9:28 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Sunday, May 22, 2005
I love continuity |
|
Just returned from my high school reunion. The hot blonde girl from my year was still a hot blonde girl (though she really shouldn't be wearing glasses), the guy who used to make all the dry remarks still made them, and the dirty history teacher still spent too much time laying his hands on women less than half his age.
So if nothing ever changes, why have reunions to see whether it has?
(Correct, or sensible, answers will be rewarded with a magical spell to ward off history teachers and/or attract hot blonde girls. Offer void where prohibited.)
|
3:28 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Tuesday, May 17, 2005
Damn, still no famous infatuated gorgeous blonde blog groupie for me |
|
From my stats:
But alas. Turns out I'm mainly popular with Kiwi domain sharks. God, I hate New Zealand.
|
19:29 |
permalink comment(s) (1) trackback(s) (0)
|
Wednesday, May 11, 2005
Ant killing with Antworks |
|
I sometimes review gadgets for national broadsheet NRC Handelsblad and a few months ago I had the opportunity of checking out the Antworks, a device to kill keep ants in. The pre-supplied ants dug themselves in so deep in the blue gel the Antworks contains that even their tracheal tubes couldn't provide them with oxygen anymore, or perhaps they popped a strychnine pill. Either way, they were all dead in a few days.
So I went to see an entomologist who told me that ants couldn't possibly survive in the Antworks. He gave me another colony of ants to prove just that. They died as well, except for the queen, who was already well on her way to colapse when I decided to set her free. Hopefully, the neighbourhood cats didn't get to her.
Needless to say, the distributor was somewhat ant-agonized by my review entitled 'Toy for sadists'. Then again, when I told her I went to see an entomologist to verify my findings, she had to look up the meaning of the word first. (Sadly, I am not kidding about the latter. Unfortunately, neither ignorance nor the entomologist's expert opinion stopped her from yelling at me. My physician says the ringing in my left ear should pass with time. In another decade or so.)
And now it turns out there are more people out there who had to have solemn ant burials, such as this guy from Bristol. So if you're looking for the perfect gift to teach that aspiring young executive about the harsh realities of business life and dog eat dog, this is it!
(By the way, I do write about 'larger' subjects than ants as well. But if you ever have an interesting gadget to review, and are pretty sure it doesn't kill anyone or -thing, drop me a line. If it's for sale in the Netherlands at least. I've got outlets in several national media, and I promise to check with an entomologist first if it turns out to suck after all.)
|
8:24 |
permalink comment(s) (3) trackback(s) (0)
|
Wednesday, May 4, 2005
The problem with writing a book |
|
Is that whilst researching it one encounters too many interesting sidetracks which tend to er... sidetrack you.
Nothing further to add, lest I get sidetracked once more.
Expect the book somewhere around 2008, ALDP (Anno Lou de Palingboer, or Lou the Eel Seller, famous Dutch cult leader).
|
20:33 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Tuesday, May 3, 2005
Friday, April 29, 2005
Mea culpa |
|
Sorry for not updating more frequently, but I have been busy. Busy with blogging, although not in a way I could share with you. I've been acting as a consultant for a Dutch publisher who will publish a blog which I co-developed somewhere next week, or very shortly thereafter. Also, I am now a hired gun for an internet blog in Dutch, which has just launched here.
I want to spend a bit more time updating my blog but the past few weeks have been out of control. I run my own company and therefore sometimes have to file budget proposals in order to obtain contracts. Well, a few months ago, I filed three such proposals, expecting to get a positive response to one of them. Instead, I got all three contracts. Since I run a one man gig, that made for some very busy 80+ hour weeks.
Meanwhile, if you're a blogger myself, may I suggest you read up on Roger L. Simon's proposal on how to make the whole blogging business more financially savvy. Worth reading. I'm sifting through the legal stuff now and am seriously considering to sign up.
|
19:03 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Wednesday, April 13, 2005
Run, Forrest, run |
|
I'm an avid runner and I like to work out whilst listening to trance music, for it helps me to maintain a steady pace. But of late, I've been unhappy with the items on offer in alt.binaries.sounds.mp3.dance. Most of it may be very pleasant after having ingested a steady quantity of methylone or MDMA, I tend to favour a drug-free running environment.
So here's my solution.
1) Go to DI FM, which offers trance music with lots of vocals and enough consonants and predictable rhythms to help you concentrate on the distance to go, rather than distract you all the time
2) Download StreamRipper32 here
3) Add DI FM's Shoutcast streaming url to StreamRipper 32, select a directory where you want to store your new MP3's and start downloading. (I have to try about ten times on average before it starts to grab the Shoutcast stream, so some initial patience is required.)
4) Wait for about a day or so, and you'll have a nice dir full of MP3 files. I tend to convert all of it to WMA using dBPowerAMP because that way I can cram more music on my Nike Philips MP3RUN player / podometer.
Niets te danken, Super de Boer.
|
19:58 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Monday, April 11, 2005
'Forget the Porsche, I'd rather drive a truck full of manure' |
|
He might as well have said that, he being Frans van Riel, the owner of a Belgian firm which rents out Porsches to other companies.
Van Riel drove journalists around today in a Porsche Boxster.
Granted, the Boxster is not exactly the most awe-inspiring car the Porsche factory ever churned out, but it's a decent set of wheels, and it was definitely more than sufficient to show off several new Pioneer gadgets which had been built into the car.
As said Japanese gizmos were not interesting enough to fully occupy my mind ('Wow, that's 0.4 lateral G's! Let me call my mum!'), I started interrogating Mr. Van Riel, for being curious is what I do for a living.
Turns out his favourite car to drive in, from all the Porsches he could choose from, was a... Citroen C5.
I think the Citroen C5 is a very good car for people who are (a) married, (b) in the possession of a Labrador retriever, (c) brain dead. Come to think of it, (a) and (b) pretty much cover (c).
There ought to be a law to disown people like Mr. Van Riel and give their cars to people who are less cold blooded, and who can provide Porsches with the TLC they both need and deserve.
(I can be contacted through the cell number provided here.)
|
21:01 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Sunday, April 10, 2005
The thin white line |
|
I love these convenient white lines on highways that help you realize that you haven't driven off into the great big yonder yet.
Especially when it's, say, about 6.30 in the morning, and you're driving too fast whilst trying to get home.
I had spent my Saturday night in (of all places) Almelo.
Almelo is one of the most beautiful towns in the Netherlands *cough*. (If you discount all the other ones, that is.)
So naturally, this is where Jacob, a friend of mine, a couple of his friends and I hit the pub. They were having a 'dance night', which in Almelo usually results in a pubescent boy deejaying his way around hip artists such as Meatloaf and Bryan Adams.
Always bring your earplugs when you go dancing in Almelo.
Anyway, I had a lot of fun, especially with the girl Jacob is having an intimate strictly platonic relationship with. Turns out she likes arguing about as much as I do.
However, I didn't drink nearly enough alcohol. Which resulted in (a) not realizing that a blonde who really wasn't that unattractive without her glasses (screw SpecSavers) was paying me a compliment (yes, I am an idiot, but I take pleasure in looking at my dad and realizing that it's hereditary), (b) me being sober enough to drive home to sleep in my own bed.
Thankfully, fatigue was enough to turn me into road hazard incarnate. First, I bumped Jacob's car into the sidewalk (when driving him home to pick up my car), then I bumped my car into a sidewalk (albeit a different one).
Yep, out on the town in Almelo. Go there now and beat the crowds!
|
13:36 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Saturday, April 9, 2005
Always a tense moment |
|
I was quite proud of myself for having fixed my washing machine yesterday. Jobs which require motor skills have never been my strong suit (other than navigating through Amsterdam traffic at insane speeds).
But just when I was about to open up a well-deserved beer, I saw them. Two screws which I had forgotten about.
More...
|
16:33 |
permalink comment(s) (1) trackback(s) (0)
|
Monday, March 28, 2005
55 minutes, 42 seconds |
|
Is my final time for the 10 kilometer run in Utrecht today. Since my goal was 55 minutes, I was 42 seconds too slow. Which doesn't mean I'm entirely unhappy, since I ran today in spite of my doctor advising me not to due to a rather persistent knee injury. (Screw him.) Also, because I've been ill most of February, I wasn't able to put in the amount of training time I would have liked.
My running partner (Martijn) beat me by 53 seconds (his final time was 54" 49'). Congrats! Oh, and never mind that he (a) was too much of a coward to set himself a challenging goal, telling me for months he would be happy to finish within 65 (!) minutes, (b) is too much of a coward to do the 16,1 km run in Amsterdam in September.
Understandably, since he would lose. Martijn only weighs about 60 kgs and is rather thin. I am still hauling around 18 kgs of excess lard, which will be gone for the most part by then. (My weight has dropped from 101,2 kgs earlier this year to about 95-96 kgs, a decrease which would have been larger if not for the disease-ridden month of February. My GP kinda objected against the idea of slimming whilst I was on the verge of contracting pneumonia.) When I run now, it feels like 'rucking', the military practice of carrying a 20 kg backpack whilst walking to places that you could drive to.
Well, Martijn generally votes Labour or Green Party, so I should probably adjust my expectations accordingly.
|
22:02 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Thursday, March 3, 2005
-20 |
|
That's the predicted temperature for the coming night in some areas of the Netherlands. (That's -4 degrees Fahrenheit for people who don't live in the civilized, metric world.)
Since my appartment doesn't have central heating, and there's only a very thin layer of glass between the chilly outside and my bedroom, I will have to sleep in my living room tonight. That's the only place in my (very old) house with a gas heater. I think it's kinda romantic though, a bit like the camping in your back yard you used to do as a kid.
I'll post a rant about the miserable excuse we've got for a national airport here in the Netherlands, but I decided it would be more fun if I gave them another night to fuck up as badly as they did last night. Numerous passengers then had to sleep on the floor because Schiphol Airport couldn't find them a place to crash (no aviation pun intended) when several flights had to be canceled. God knows you can't fly when it's below zero. That's why Anchorage has no airport.
Good night y'all.
|
23:09 |
permalink comment(s) (2) trackback(s) (0)
|
Wednesday, March 2, 2005
Snow day |
|
It's been over twenty years since this much snow fell in the Netherlands. The northern provinces of Friesland, Groningen and Drenthe sometimes recorded twenty inches of snow, which for Dutch measures is quite a lot. In Amsterdam, we had about 4 to 8 inches, depending on where you were.
So I grabbed my camera and took some pictures. (All of them can be enlarged by clicking on them.)
Unfortunately, I can't show you any shots of my near-collisions due to excessive slipperiness (I was too busy trying to avoid said near-collisions becoming actual ones).
So I guess this migratory polar bear will have to do.
A Jack Russell thoroughly enjoying a snow shower, courtesy of his boss.
A small footbridge near the Eramus Park. Funny how snow makes it look impressive.
The first snow this particular bear has seen in a long time.
There must be a car under here. Somewhere.
I don't know why, but somehow, this picture radiates tranquility.
Oh, by the way, I was kidding yesterday when I made a reference to the alleged greenhouse effect and the current weather. Turns out there's actually a meteorologist who is making the case.
|
21:00 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Monday, February 28, 2005
Saturday, February 26, 2005
Heart to heart with a Muslim |
|
The good thing about living in the precinct of Amsterdam that has the most Muslims of all is that I often get the chance to actually talk to one, unlike most Dutch who seem to be content with regurgitating prefabricated leftist ('it's all a matter of perspective') or right-wing ('Islam is incompatible with democracy') views.
Yesterday I had an extensive conversation with a Muslim in the sauna at my local gym. Our little talk struck me all the more since our stories seemed so similar. I've been raised an orthodox Christian: purchasing anything on a Sunday was a sin, sex before marriage as well, and living your life by the rule of the Good Book might not save you from an eternal stay in pits full of brimstone. There was praedestination (thank Calvin) to make sure you were kept on your toes.
I broke with Christianity at the age of 19. It was a long and very painful process, which kept me awake many a night during the year that the exorcism of orthodoxy took. Unlike many former Christians I know, I feel no need to make fun of my former beliefs. I remember how it felt when I believed, and how much it comforted it me to have a personal connection with God (which my former brand of Protestantism calls 'bevindelijkheid'. I'm not sure if there's an English word for that).
At age 19, I decided I would still consider myself a spiritual person, but I couldn't uphold the orthodox doctrines of my branch of Christianity any longer. I left my church, and up until this day I stand by my decision.
When I got my first serious girlfriend, she moved in with me very soon. Needless to say we didn't just hold hands, and equally needless to say, this was much to the dismay of my father. He used to be an elder in my former church, and still is a devout member.
Image my surprise when I heard the Islamic guy in the sauna tell very much the same story. If I can believe him, at this very moment, the same conflict me and my family went through is currently an issue in a lot of Muslim families.
Although I know how painful the process of secularization can be, this has made me hopeful. Deo volente or insha'allah, a more moderate form of Islam will rise, and perhaps even a new branch of humanism, to help rid the earth of the scourge of fascist thugs who abuse religions for their own political goals.
|
10:33 |
permalink comment(s) (1) trackback(s) (0)
|
Wednesday, February 23, 2005
All hail the smoking doctor |
|
Not only is Battlestar Galactica (BSG) the highest rated show ever since the inception of the SciFi Channel, and not only have their brass decided to give BSG a second season after only five eps of the first had been aired; now it turns out the second season will consist of an impressive twenty episodes. (That is impressive if you consider the first season only has thirteen eps, the final one consisting of loads of very frustrating cliffhangers.)
Slainte mhath, or: here's to a show that will make it acceptable, and perhaps even fashionable, again to say you like scifi.
For our Dutch readers: drop me a line if you know of any Dutch tv stations that have purchased the broadcasting rights (or are considering to do so).
|
22:39 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Monday, February 14, 2005
Wednesday, February 9, 2005
Go see 'Team America'! |
|
One of the upsides of being struck with fever is finally having the time to view some slightly less than legal DVD's containing films which haven't yet been released in Europe. (Am more than willing to pay - just not to wait four frigging months.)
Definitely the best thing about Team America are some of the songs. 'Freedom isn't free' is a country song which is ever so slightly over the top, and constantly made me reminisce of Darryl Worley. Can't say it's satire of Shostakovich quality, but it's more than adequate for movie music. And so is 'America Fuck Yeah!', which manages to take the piss at excess patriotism without becoming overtly cynical at the same time. (I liked the slavery line.)
Oh, and I never really liked Alec Baldwin, but any remaining positive feelings towards him have been completely dealt with after seeing this flick.
(The Team America March is going to be my ringtone for the next month or so. David Arnold meets Sousa. Just to piss off liberals.)
Click here for some (legal) samples.
|
15:22 |
permalink comment(s) (1) trackback(s) (0)
|
Monday, February 7, 2005
A healthy fat guy |
|
The good news: I had a weight loss medical on Friday which showed (a) I have a very high oxygen uptake for a heavy guy such as myself (4215 ml / minute), (b) I have very low cholesterol (4,0 mmol) for a heavy guy such as myself, (c) I've got a very good recovery rate after intense exercise for a heavy guy such as myself.
The bad news I must have made myself vulnerable to some nasty piece of (m)RNA. I'm back at the almost same fever I had about a month ago: over 39 degrees Celsius (that's a 102 degrees Fahrenheit for you).
Updates might therefore not be forthcoming.
Off to bed now, after having downed two longdrink glasses of grog (brandy with lemon juice, grapefruit juice, tangerine juice and cane sugar). God bless America for selling stuff like Tylenol Flu (illegal in Europe because you can make drugs out of it. God knows there's no drugs here, no sir.)
|
22:20 |
permalink comment(s) (2) trackback(s) (0)
|
Wednesday, February 2, 2005
Sunday, January 30, 2005
Weight loss update |
|
2/1/2005: 100,4 kgs
9/1/2005: 98,0 kgs
16/1/2005: 97,7 kgs
23/1/2005: 97,4 kgs
30/1/2005: 95,5 kgs
This is really quite weird. Must be that sauna visit two days ago. I'm expecting a rebound next week, because this can't be right.
|
12:23 |
permalink comment(s) (1) trackback(s) (0)
|
Tuesday, January 25, 2005
Weight loss update |
|
2/1/2005: 100,4 kgs
9/1/2005: 98,0 kgs
16/1/2005: 97,7 kgs
23/1/2005: 97,4 kgs
OK, so it's not going as rapidly as I'd like. At this rate, I will only lose about a kilogram a month. On the plus side, help may be on the way. More news about that somewhere next week.
|
9:47 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Monday, January 17, 2005
Saturday run in graphic form |
|
Now you can exercise by proxy, by staring at the graphs of the workouts Blauw Oog and I have on Saturday nights. (Lots of beautiful women on the road as well in Utrecht on a dark evening, no need to worry about our social life.) Anyway, this graphic was made during the 5,5 km run described below, using a Philips-Nike MP3RUN, which is an obscenely expensive device consisting of a) an MP3-player, b) a Bluetooth enabled sensor which attaches to a shoe and tracks your progress. I've been testing it for quite a while now, as I had to write a review about it in NRC Handelsblad (a national Dutch quality newspaper). In that time, I've found it to be quite accurate. The only downside is the price tag of about 350 euros, which is excessive for a 256 MB player. Even if it does produce graphics like these:
(The parts where we slow down reflect time spent waiting at busy intersections.)
|
18:34 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Minor annoyances of life |
|
• Having just exercised for over an hour, and feeling all freshed up, only to walk into a cloud of smoker's exhaust on my way out of the fitness center
• Stopping before a zebra crossing in a one lane street because a mother with her baby is trying to cross, only to find a Frenchman (go figure) tries to overtake you anyway, nearly hurting said pedestrians in the process
• Trying to drive into the street where you live, but nearly crashing into a road block which wasn't there when you left, meaning it was probably put there by construction workers who have been terrorizing the neighborhood for five consecutive months already
If any Americans still don't understand why Europe has gun control laws, this is why. Because it sure as hell is good I can't get my hands on one today. Raaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!
Phew, that feels better.
(In no way does low blood sugar due to intense dieting have anything to do with my explosive mood. No sir.)
|
17:45 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Thursday, January 13, 2005
Terrorism explained |
|
Having just had my first Arabic lesson, I can fully empathize with any radical Islamists out there. I've had to stare at the Arabic alphabet for just an hour and a half, rather than my entire life, and I'm already going nuts. It takes five weeks just to learn the characters, before we can start on slightly less elementary stuff such as grammar. Meanwhile, I can practice such Arabic essentials as the sound ayn, which, according to Wikipedia, is a 'laryngeal voiced fricative'. Right.
|
21:12 |
permalink comment(s) (3) trackback(s) (0)
|
Sunday, January 9, 2005
Saturday, January 8, 2005
Monday, January 3, 2005
Vote for me! |
|
Thanks to you guys I am now one of the top 20 contestants in a Dutch business plan contest, about which I've written before here.
However, it's going to be a long and hard battle. The finish line is still weeks away, on the 31st of January, so I beg you to keep on voting for me.
You can do so once a day.
In order to save you the hassle, here is a very easy way of doing it. Just click here. Please bookmark it and visit it every day until the end of this month.
Thanks!
|
13:36 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Some obligatory New Year's Resolutions |
|
• I am going to lose weight. A lot, to be precise. Yes, I know the entire world tells itself the same thing. But I will pull it off. And to create enough peer pressure (even though I'm arrogant enough to think I haven't got that many peers), I will be writing a column about it in the Dutch edition of Men's Health. 60,000 readers should be enough pressure to keep it up. Oh, the amount of weight? About 20 kilograms. The first 2 are gone already, partly thanks to the nasty stomach flu of last week. As a benchmark, I'll be posting my weight loss per week. We are currently at 99, the end goal is 78, or my weight two years ago, before I started my own company and grew into a fat pig.
• I am going to run in the Utrecht City Marathon on the 28th of March. Not the full 42 kilometres, but the 10 kilometre version, together with my pal Blauw Oog. My goal is to do it within 55 minutes, which is still very slow compared to the world record, but then again, I'm no athlete. Blauw Oog has a personal goal of 65 minutes, but he has a habit of aiming too low. I can do 10 kilometres in 60 minutes quite easily, so I've got 3 months to shave off those 5 minutes.
• I am going to party quite a bit more. There were too many 80 hour working weeks in 2004, so a little R'n'R would probably be called for every now and then. I guess this resolution may be one of the hardest to keep, me being a workaholic and all that...
Let me conclude by wishing you all a very obligatory but heartfelt happy 2005!
|
8:55 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Friday, December 31, 2004
Help me! |
|
I'm participating in a Dutch business plan contest in which the most original business idea can get 25,000 euros in seed funding. If I win, I won't see a dime of the money itself, instead the organizing company will pay my bills until the 25 grand has been spent.
Here's the catch. In the end, a jury is going to make a choice between the different ideas. But the preselection is done by website visitors.
So if you'd all be so kind to click here and vote for me, I would be much obliged. You can vote once a day and all votes add to the end total, so please keep it up!
I need to be with the first twenty to be able to be nominated, and currently, I'm somewhere in the eighties (after only half a day) so it should be doable.
HERE'S HOW TO VOTE: (yes, it works for foreigners too)
1. Go to this address.
2. Click 'Stem' in the little grey box (down the page, in the right-hand side of the screen).
3. Click the box next to 'Ik wil me inschrijven voor de dagelijkse zibb.nl nieuwsbrief'.
4. Enter [yourfirstname]@isopeda.nl as an email address. (Try [yourfirstandlastname]@isopeda.nl if this doesn't work. This can happen when someone with a similar first name has already voted before you that day.)
5. Click 'nu stemmen!'.
6. If you get a quiz, choose either one of the three options and click 'nu stemmen' again.
You have just voted for me and signed me up for the newsletter they force down your throat. I will deal with that, I am just grateful for y'all taking the trouble.
Don't forget that you can vote once a day, with the same email address that you used at 4). So please, pretty please, with lots of sugar or Nutrasweet on top (depending on your New Year diet plans), bookmark the site and return every day for the next few weeks.
Oh, and the business plan itself? That's for a website called www.paarsekrokodil.nl (Purple Crocodile) which will enable Dutch customers to spout their anger about bureaucracy and bad service they've encountered in their contacts with Dutch companies. The website is named after a rather (in)famous commercial which satirizes the customer disservice endemic amongst many Dutch companies. I've got ideas how to make such a website profitable and customer-friendly too, of course, but you'll forgive me for not posting those here.
(Yes, I've already claimed the domain name.)
Thanks for voting!
|
17:43 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Thursday, December 30, 2004
Homecoming from Kalutara |
|
(Image courtesy of Digital Globe.)
Yesterday, my family, my sister's boyfriend and yours truly, were lucky enough to be able to go to Schiphol Airport to meet our sister. As the true scale of the disaster has become apparent in the past few days, I need not dwell on the signifance of the word 'lucky'. Otherwise, take a look at the satellite picture of the beach my sister was residing at. The brownish stuff beneath the waves is the beach her hotel was positioned next to.
If you haven't done so, please donate. For Dutch readers, this can be done very easily through this website, everyone else can use a plethora of different websites, although Amazon.Com is probably a good bet.
These photographs of my sister's homecoming probably say enough.
My sister, in the white top, walks into the arrivals hall. No thanks to the assholes at Martinair, my brother Richard and I were not allowed to meet her at the gate (my parents and her boyfriend were) so she got emotional all over again when she saw us. Happy food for the media, which had been kept away from said gate for this exact reason. Nice going, Martinair. I wonder why you still mainly do charters and have never become a proper airline. (Well, I guess my father could have given them a harder time as well, and my brother and I could have whined some if that hadn't helped, but anyway.) Her boyfriend, who is confusingly also called Richard, can be seen right behind my sister. Yeah, he's the bald guy. Must be the inside that counts.
Like I said, happy food for the media.
Like I said, happy f... Oh, sod it.
My sister and her boyfriend again. (The bald one is not my sister.)
NOOT VOOR FAMILIELEDEN: hier is een bestand te downloaden met hoge-resolutieversies van de foto's. Dit bestand is beschermd met een wachtwoord. Mail me daarvoor.
NOTE TO EVERYBODY ELSE, ESPECIALLY DUTCH MEDIA: These photographs were made by me and their copyright resides with me. Under Dutch copyright law, all the people pictured are proprietors of their respective portrait rights. If you wish to use these images, send me an email and I will consider it. Be aware that I feel my sister should (and will) have the final word in all these matters. If I see any of the photographs from this site reproduced anywhere else without my permission, I will send my cat to visit you in the night, as well as some hungry lawyers. And no, I'm not bluffing. Scroll downwards to see the vicious critter. (A photograph of hungry lawyers can be made available upon request.)
My email address can be found in the left-hand column of this website.
|
18:25 |
permalink comment(s) (1) trackback(s) (0)
|
Tuesday, December 28, 2004
Limited updates for a while |
|
I've been grounded by a severe stomach flu and a 40 degrees Celsius fever (that's 104 in Fahrenheit). Hope to be back soon.
|
8:47 |
permalink comment(s) (3) trackback(s) (0)
|
Sunday, December 26, 2004
Saturday, December 25, 2004
Merry Christmas! |
|
On behalf of my cat, who will be dining on salmon today for reasons he's completely oblivious to, and myself, I wish all of you a very merry Christmas (as well as a cat who wants to sit #@%! still when you're trying to photograph him in front of a couple of candles and a few badly cleaned windows).
(Oh, for those of you with a strong stomach and a sense of humor: here's a Dutchman's X-mas wish from the Canary Islands. No bikini-clad women on sunny beaches though. Sorry.)
|
9:41 |
permalink comment(s) (1) trackback(s) (0)
|
Friday, December 24, 2004
Online shopping: Albert versus Amazon.Com |
|
I've been fond of Amazon.Com ever since it went online. In fact, Amazon.Com was the main reason for me to apply for a credit card, which weren't as common in the Netherlands in the 90's as they were in the USA (come to think of it, they still aren't, although we're catching up).
Once, I ordered a shipment of books which turned out to have been damaged in the shipping process. One email to Amazon.Com was enough to have a completely new set of books shipped off to me. The Amazon.Com customer rep didn't even demand that I send the damaged books back for proof. The undamaged copies arrived within two weeks, which is fast for an intercontinental shipment.
Compare that to Albert, the Dutch online supermarket which is owned by Ahold. Apparently, bookkeeping isn't the only thing they suck at. On Sunday, I placed an order of nearly 200 euros for Christmas supplies. Today, I was pleasantly surprised to find the bill a tad lower than that. I soon found out why. Twelve items hadn't been shipped, including such essentials as toilet paper. The website of Albert is supposed to inform you of logistical problems when an order is placed.
So you can imagine how glad I was when an Albert customer rep gave me a call just now. Because I am such a valued customer, he was delighted to offer me a 50 percent discount on delivery costs on my next order. According to Albert, a 3,40 euro discount makes up for having to go into the supermarket on the busiest day of the year, because of the incompetence of a company whose services you used to avoid said shopping hell in the first place.
Needless to say, Albert will henceforth have one fewer 'valued customer'.
I just hope I've got enough of their marketing materials to wipe my bum with till Monday.
|
9:54 |
permalink comment(s) (1) trackback(s) (0)
|
Saturday, December 18, 2004
Why I hate Christmas |
|
• It always takes lots of duct tape to restrain the cat long enough for me to safely fit him with his Christmas sweater
• Escort services charge through the nose on the 25th of December, and the girls tend to be really cranky
• You have to be friendly to people
OK, none of the above is true. However, I did just finish writing 54 Christmas cards. I also updated my address book, which, like every year, turned out to be woefully incomplete. And finally, I dumped all the cards in the mailbox. This may not sound like a lot of effort, but it is. To prevent damage from fireworks, Dutch mail has narrowed the openings in all mail boxes to extremely small slits. This means the cards have to be thrown in one by one.
So if you receive a card, cherish it. I must be very fond of you.
|
18:45 |
permalink comment(s) (2) trackback(s) (0)
|
Thursday, December 16, 2004
Ad hominem |
|
As Arendo Joustra, editor of Elsevier News Weekly and one of my mentors, once told his young apprentice (me): never try to make yourself look big by making someone else look small.
In the past week, however, I've read with astonishment three articles by three people I (used to) admire degrading three other people on a personal level. One of the three attacked persons is dead now, which makes it all the more distasteful.
(And no, I won't be mentioning any names, as that might make me guilty of doing exactly the same, although I'm sure it would be more fun to read.)
Must be the spirit of Christmas, ensuring there'll be plenty to make up for next weekend.
|
10:25 |
permalink comment(s) (1) trackback(s) (0)
|
Friday, December 10, 2004
No house for me |
|
I got the results this afternoon of the lottery for the house I wanted to buy in the center of Amsterdam. As expected, there's far more demand than there's space for houses. I got number 52, which means that if 51 people decide they don't want the house they applied for, I'll get it. In other words: ain't gonna happen.
|
17:49 |
permalink comment(s) (5) trackback(s) (0)
|
Wednesday, December 8, 2004
Thanks for nothing, Demon Internet |
|
I spent nearly a day without internet thanks to the fine people at Demon Internet. In light of my appreciation for the quality of service they provide (this wasn't the first time I got some unexpected spare time), I've prepared some slogans for their next ad campaign:
• Start your time in purgatory here on Earth! Use Demon Internet!
• Good sys admins go to heaven, bad sys admins get a job offer at Demon Internet.
• Subscribe to Demon Internet now, and get a free apocalyptic horse to bring you to the nearest internet cafe anytime you please. You'll need it!
OK, the last one wasn't really catchy but then again, neither is Demon Internet. It sure smells like brimstone here.
|
9:28 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Sunday, December 5, 2004
Checking out a lifelong dream |
|
Having been a rather impoverished journalist for quite some time, certain things were always out of my grasp.
However, I've managed to save a bit of money in the past two years, meaning that I've finally got enough money to get my pilot's licence. That is, if the kind doctors at Schiphol Airport make a favorable decision about my eyesight. I had surgery three times when I was a kid to correct a lazy eye, and I'm scared out of my mind that a doctor will end my dream with one red cross on a medical exam form.
Any guys or girls out there who've been there and want to share?
|
12:06 |
permalink comment(s) (2) trackback(s) (0)
|
Sunday, November 28, 2004
Blogger asking for crossed fingers |
|
For those of you who've just read the item about the Van Gogh crosses: no pun intended. Really.
This wasteland is where, hopefully, my future penthouse will be.
Although it's already certain the penthouse itself will be built, whether I'll get it is another matter. There is so much demand for good housing in Amsterdam that the number of applicants exceeds the number of new appartments.
So they will have a lottery.
If you like this blog, and have some divine favors left, please don't hesitate to use them now on my behalf.
(Otherwise, there may never be a housewarming party at the 11th floor, which means I can't invite you either.)
|
15:55 |
permalink comment(s) (1) trackback(s) (0)
|
Gruesome picture from ethnically torn Amsterdam West |
|
Did you see that one autumn leaf charging at that poor little broken twig?
(This picture was taking about 200 metres from my house, again with my P900. SonyEricsson had better start paying me.)
|
15:49 |
permalink comment(s) (1) trackback(s) (0)
|
Wednesday, November 17, 2004
Sunday, November 14, 2004
A Saturday night with Hitler |
|
I wanted to spend my Saturday night with something blonde, but the pet store was all out of golden retrievers.
So Blue Eye and me decided to go to 'Der Untergang', a supposedly shocking movie which supposedly would show a 'human' Hitler.
All I saw, for about 150 very long and boring minutes, was someone without any human depth at all. (This from a guy who sits through five documentaries from 'The World at War' in a row.) Bruno Ganz portrayed a Hitler very much like the monster we knew already: a ruthless murderer who (don't they just love these wonderful little contradictory quirks - yawn) was also a vegetarian and really kind to Eva Braun and his cook.
Thanks, Bruno, but we knew that. What we'd like to know is if there was anything more to him than clichés from a junior high history book.
The truth is that Germany probably isn't ready to make a truly innovative film about Hitler. That country has been nearly masochistic in wallowing about its World War II guilt. This film, by laying at least part of the responsibility of what happened by the Nazi ideology and Hitler rather than endless emotional flagellating, means they are finally moving beyond that. (Not that they forewent the flagellating entirely.)
Perhaps they should have put a little sign on the cinema stating 'Germans only', although I suppose I see how that could have offended some people.
I did like the part where nearly defeated Nazis had mindless sex, though that could just have been my imagination trying to overcompensate for lots of overacted bunker scenes.
|
10:57 |
permalink comment(s) (0) trackback(s) (0)
|
Friday, October 22, 2004
You are cordially invited (American election night) |
|
To watch the results of the 2004 American presidential election at my house. Starting at 10 PM, we'll watch the news (hopefully, I'll be able to unscramble FOX and MSNBC again before then) and eat jellybeans. (At 9 AM on Wednesday, at the very latest, I'll kick everyone out since I have an appointment at 11 AM in Utrecht. You can watch any Supreme Court dealings from the comfort of your home, this time.)
Everyone is welcome, provided:
• You send me an email. I live in a small appartment and it couldn't possibly hold more than ten people comfortably, so it's handy to know how many are coming. Ignore this if you're a 6 foot tall blonde from Sweden. If you are, feel free to drop by at any time (Norway is fine too).
• You don't mind me cheering for Bush (yes, I think he's an awful president. I just think Kerry would be even worse).
• You bring some American food and/or drink to complement the high caloric finger food I'll be providing.
There'll be basic beer (I'll try to get some American microbrews) and a bit of fingerfood (the aforementioned jellybeans, as well as some hashbrowns for breakfast).
(BTW: I promised some of you an essay explaining why Battlestar Galactica 2004 is a great show. It really is, and I'll need a little more time to finish the essay about it. Personally, I think it's as groundbreaking as Star Trek - TOS was in the sixties - and now just as then, people are bound not to realize the greatness in front of them for another two decades.)
|
23:32 |
permalink comment(s) (2) |
Friday, October 15, 2004
A man of maturity |
|
Today I went to the university hospital to get my hepatitis and tetanus shots for the trip to Jordan or Iraq. The friendly nurse obviously immediately realized she was dealing with a mature individual. So she gave me a Band-Aid from her special supply.
Thanks, nurse.
|
16:15 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
Tuesday, October 12, 2004
Book a trip to Iraq! And enjoy: |
|
• The flight from Kuwait to Baghdad, on a military plane 'with missile diverting technology'
• The trip from the airport to the Green Zone, with 'a convoy of at least three vehicles with armoured protection and two armed soldiers in each one'
• Our spacious accomodations, bunking in portacabins with 'bomb proof roofs'
• Mandatory bulletproof vests, provided courtesy of the British government!
• Insurance arrangements which cover a maximum of L 250,000 in damages. That's if you die. Losing a leg probably yields less.
In other words, Tudor's response to my email with questions about the safety situation in Iraq made for interesting reading.
The funny thing is, I can live with the hazards (that is, while I'm still alive, obviously). But being Dutch, the thing that worries me most, is the miserably low insurance payout. I'd like to get paid a few millions if I get disabled. The fact that it doesn't, genuinely worries me more than the risk of getting killed. Does that say something about our fair nation? That we don't mind being shot, as long as someone pays for a decent casket? In other words: ignore the risks, just not the possible consequences.
I had a good conversation as well today with the Dutch embassy in Baghdad. The gentleman on the other side told me he'd already been hit by a bullet once although he was rather vague on the details. The Dutch embassy however is not in the Green Zone. Instead, it's in-between the Green Zone (or formally: the International Zone) and Sadr City, the latter not exactly being the most friendly neighbourhood. He told me to send him an email or to call him on his cell if I were to go. He asked me to register myself with them should I go, and even said that someone of the Dutch embassy might want to meet up with me in the Green Zone. Funny. I've never felt more proud of this nation than when I heard that. It made me proud to hear the expression 'Dutch courage' being proved wrong.
I also talked to Gerard van der Zande of DSM. DSM is a Dutch company that produces Dyneema, a synthetic fibre used in body armor. I wrote an article on Dyneema a few years ago for Elsevier News Weekly (for all you Yanks and Poms: the largest news weekly in the Netherlands with a circulation of over 140,000). He recommended I should go, and also told me lots of stuff which eased my mind. Gerard is sort of a war veteran. He served with the Dutch army as a PR officer during the Balkan wars. He told me the front line is usually the safest place, as people there tend to be prepared for trouble, whereas they get sloppy in the supposedly safer areas. The Green Zone is pretty much the front line.
Then again, Arendo, the editor of Elsevier News Weekly, was far less enthusiastic. He promised to send me an explanation tomorrow. To make things even more interesting, Tudor (for those who haven't been paying attention: the guy who wants to hire me) has also indicated it's possible to move the whole thing to Amman. That's in Jordan, for those who are geographically challenged. There is even the possibility of doing a Kerry: saying 'yes' to Iraq now, and flipflop later, for example when the security situation in the Green Zone deteriorates. If that were to happen, we could still do a last-minute rescheduling to Jordan. For now, my biggest issue is with the insurance arrangements.
It's a hard call. The hardest one I ever made. Should I go or not?
|
0:05 |
permalink comment(s) (1) |
Sunday, October 10, 2004
Saturday, October 9, 2004
Was I ever this young? |
|
Damn, 29 already. Before you know it I'll whither and die.
Anyway, this is a picture I took Thursday night while delivering a lecture on the CBS memo scandal at Leiden University.
Those of you who attended the lecture may also be interested in my notes as well as the latest JibJab animation which contains a Dan Rather reference.
(The picture, by the way, was made with my SE P900, hence the grainy quality.)
|
15:48 |
permalink comment(s) (2) |
Friday, October 8, 2004
Lecture notes for Leiden University students |
|
Yesterday night, I gave a lecture on the CBS memo hoax at Leiden University. The notes I used, will appear on this spot somewhere in the course of Friday. They need to be converted to PDF first and right now, I'm having way too much fun cuddling the cat.
Thank you for your understanding.
Update 2.03: I've uploaded the lecture notes in a later blog entry.
|
0:34 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
Saturday, October 2, 2004
Neighbours, beware! |
|
I will have my first piano lesson on Wednesday. There's still time to move out and find a safe shelter for yourself and your loved ones.
Since I've also started taking singing and songwriting lessons, leaving may indeed be a very sensible thing to do.
Of course, I'm all for it if the neighbours decide to chip in so they can buy me a house in a remote location. Hint: I like beaches.
|
10:36 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
Thursday, September 30, 2004
Destroying a sandwich |
|
'Campina Butter Gold spreads straight from the fridge.'
Sure. If you preheat the knife with a welding torch.
(Thank God there was still some cat food in the cupboard.)
|
18:39 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
Wednesday, September 22, 2004
New love |
|
There are worse things than owning an Acer laptop, but none of those exist in this space-time continuum.
Fortunately, their complaints department is a whole lot more efficient than their products, and they decided to give me my money back, after nearly one year of having to send back my laptop continuously.
I bought an IBM Thinkpad T42 instead, which arrived two days ago.
In case you were looking for an explanation for the intermittent blogging, this is it.
|
22:05 |
permalink comment(s) (1) |
Anybody want to meet a really pissed off cat with foam coming out of his mouth? |
|
Visit me somewhere in the wee early morning hours. At that time, my recently neutered cat gets his antibiotics. I think he would prefer the electric chair, but unfortunately, this being the Netherlands, the government won't allow me to have one of those. (Also, lots of current probably won't rid him of his bacteria, since microbes seem to fester in cadavers.)
I really should get out more.
|
21:16 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
We do not break away from combat |
|
Although perhaps I should have, considering the bruises covering both my arms and both my hands. (Nah, it's fine. Really.) We got some decent exercise yesterday night, with sifu Martijn giving us a very hard time during the warming-up exercises. This of course had nothing do with the fact that, due to a nearly fatal car crash, he is majorly pissed off that he can't do proper workouts like the rest of us. Remember: if you notice my T-shirt is starting to fit a bit too snugly, it's muscles, not beer.
|
21:13 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
Sunday, September 19, 2004
Coming soon to a DNS server near you |
|
Karmic Street Justice, a new entry point for this website. It sort of counterbalances the Dutch name, which I think is ironic. Or paradoxical. Or just really stupid. Whatever.
|
11:37 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
Wednesday, September 15, 2004
Soft Egg goes English, or: a Dutch journalist's attempt to improve his proficiency in written English |
|
The caption above will be the first and last example of so-called 'MAVO-Engels' you will see on this website. Well, hopefully. For our American readers - hi Kelly! - MAVO-Engels is sort of comparable to having a SAT verbal score below 300. In other words, it really sucks.
Henceforth, Zacht Ei will be in English.
There, I said it. (Still working on an English URL.)
As with many great ideas, this one wasn't mine. (This of course has the added advantage of me being able to backtrack on my decision whenever I feel like it and subsequently blame someone else.)
Anyway. What prompted this change into English was an email I received yesterday, inviting me to contribute to an American website. To keep levels of suspense at a desired high, I will not disclose which site.
It made me realize two things.
First, I'd really like to be published in English.
Second, I am not nearly as experienced in writing English articles as I'd like to be. There are probably loads of rough and slightly softer edges that need polishing, and I definitely could use the confidence that stems from more experience. The last time I actually wrote a substantial article in English was in 1997, during a four month stint in Dublin. Writing a blog in English will provide that experience.
Problem is, I can't do this alone, and hiring a professional native speaker to be a 'virtual editor' would be insanely expensive, whilst not necessarily providing me with the feedback I need. The cat would starve and I would finally lose that weight I've always wanted to get rid off, until the time came that I would be forced to eat the cat.
Therefore, I'd like to invite all native speakers, preferably those with experience in journalism, to comment on style and grammar. Be merciless if you like - that's what an American or British editor would be.
One caveat: when I say native speakers, I really do mean native speakers. Dutch folks are strong headed and tend to overestimate their own capacities (I myself being a fine specimen). I have no desire whatsoever to get into endless debates with people who know as little as I do when it comes to proper English writing. If that sounds harsh, well yes, I guess it is.
This website isn't called Soft Egg for no reason, you know.
|
10:16 |
permalink comment(s) (1) |
Tuesday, September 14, 2004
Thursday, September 9, 2004
Monday, August 30, 2004
Lang leve Acer |
|
Nee, die kop betekent niet dat ik opeens dol ben op dit merk. Het betekent alleen dat er eindelijk een oplossing is gevonden in het nu al een jaar durende drama met mijn Travelmate-notebook. Ik krijg mijn geld terug en ga een andere laptop kopen. Niet verrassend: dat wordt geen Acer, maar vermoedelijk een IBM Thinkpad T42, of iets soortgelijks.
|
21:07 |
permalink comment(s) (2) |
Friday, August 27, 2004
Na zonneschijn komt regen |
|
Want als ik bedenk dat ik nu in het van onweer vergeven Miami had kunnen zitten, begin ik toch nog net weer wat gemotiveerder aan de werkdag. Nu is een ander de pineut. Sterkte, Herbert!
(Ja, mijn werkdag begon vandaag om tien uur. Had je wat?)
|
10:34 |
permalink comment(s) (1) |
Wednesday, August 25, 2004
Een van die dagen |
|
U kent het wel. Van die dagen dat:
• De kat tijdens het schoonmaken een lik neemt van een met chloor bewerkt schepje
• Diezelfde kat vervolgens niet wil meewerken met het mondspoelen
• Er geen niet-prikkende jodium meer is om de zes krabben op uw arm te sterilliseren, maar gelukkig nog wel medicinale alcohol
• Een nieuw navigatiesysteem u op weg naar de tandarts regelrecht de file instuurt, wat niet nodig was geweest
• De tandarts vervolgens de te plaatsen kroon niet geleverd heeft gekregen
• Zijn beide telefoons het niet doen zodat hij niet eens de kronenboer van jottum kan geven
• U daardoor wel anderhalf uur heeft verspild terwijl er ook nog twee deadlines wachten
• De vervangende laptop die u van Acer toegestuurd hebt gekregen, geen zin heeft om de backup van zijn immer kwakkelende voorganger te accepteren, waarna enkel het herinstalleren van zo'n 30 programma's als mogelijkheid overblijft
• De kat ook aan het einde van de dag nog altijd chagrijnig in een hoekje zit, terwijl u het toch zo goed had bedoeld.
|
17:32 |
permalink comment(s) (2) |
Sunday, August 22, 2004
Nasleep van het Zacht Ei-feest, u mede aangeboden door Acer Computers |
|
Want omdat mijn laptop nog altijd niet is gefixt, kan ik de gemaakte foto's met mijn SE P900 nu niet met u delen.
Positief was dan weer wel dat het droog bleef gedurende het gegrilde-dodedierenonderdelenfeest. Ook positief: er bleef genoeg over om vanochtend oud-Engels te kunnen ontbijten met gegrilde-dodedierenonderdelen. Evenmin vervelend: Peter O. had desgevraagd zelfs iets blonds meegebracht. Daarentegen minder positief: ik ben nu zo brak als een Zeeuwse vijver in 1953 en van werken komt weer eens een keer helemaal niets.
Rest me nog alle aanwezigen hartelijk te danken voor hun doorzettingsvermogen.
|
15:41 |
permalink comment(s) (3) |
Friday, August 20, 2004
ID&T, up yours! |
|
Ik heb altijd al grote feesten willen organiseren, en als het waar is dat het universum samenspant om je dromen te laten uitkomen (dankjewel voor de indoctrinatie, Coelho), dan heb ik nu een voorteken van jewelste te pakken.
Vanmiddag belde Bram Eijsenring, co-presentator van het Yorin-programma Bad Boyz.
Bram was op zoek naar rare, wilde feesten.
Nu, dan moet hij niet bij mij zijn. Ik ken maar heel weinig wilde mensen, waarvan de laatste bovendien bij de vorige zomerbarbecue zijn opgegaan. En dus moest ik hem teleurstellen. Het Zacht Ei-feest morgenavond is gewoon een vrolijk samenzijn van vrienden, bekenden en een enkel familielid, die zich zullen vergrijpen aan alcohol, diverse lipiderijke versnaperingen plus gegrilde dodedierenonderdelen.
Maar toch. Hoe kwam Bram bij zijn speurtocht naar bijzondere feesten voor zijn uitzending bij mij terecht?
Nou, via Google dus.
De implicaties zijn natuurlijk enorm. Als een (ok, niet zo) eenvoudige sterveling als moi ID&T's Mysteryland er nu al onbedoeld publicitair uitconcurreert, dan moet ik wel onstuitbaar zijn als ik er echt werk van ga maken.
Hou me alsjeblieft tegen als ik 's nachts in de buurt van de RAI wil gaan crossen.
|
17:13 |
permalink comment(s) (1) |
Thursday, August 19, 2004
Zacht Ei-feest: Path to Party |
|
Oftewel: de routebeschrijving
Het gaat natuurlijk om dit feest, waar u zich nog altijd voor kunt aanmelden.
Hij is simpel: zorg eerst dat je op de A9 tussen Amstelveen en Diemen terechtkomt. Wie vanaf de A1 komt, moet daarvoor bij knooppunt Diemen de afslag A9 richting Amstelveen nemen, wie vanaf de A2 komt, kies bij knooppunt Holendrecht voor de afslag A9 richting Diemen. Of in een plaatje uitgedrukt:
Neem vervolgens op de A9 de afslag Bijlmermeer, en volg de Langbroekdreef richting de Bijlmermeer:
Het is dan nog ongeveer 800 meter naar het Langbroekpad. Je kunt aan het begin van het Langbroekpad parkeren, zoals weergegeven op onderstaand kaartje. De rest van het pad is verboden toegang voor auto's, uitgezonderd 'bestemmingsverkeer'. Het is niet aan te raden door te rijden naar de feestlocatie (zie opnieuw onderstaand kaartje), aangezien a) er bijna geen parkeerruimte op de feestlocatie is, b) je auto langs diverse paaltjes gemanoeuvreerd moet worden, c) je hem dus nevernooit zonder brokken meer kunt verwijderen na het consumeren van een grenadine met beukennootjes.
Het ontvangstcomité verwacht u komende zaterdag vanaf 18.00. Komt u er met govenbaande routebeschrijving niet uit, klik dan hier. Ik ben mobiel te bereiken op 06-45190498. Acquisitie naar aanleiding van deze advertentie wordt niet op prijs gesteld. Void where prohibited.
|
10:02 |
permalink comment(s) (2) |
Wednesday, August 18, 2004
KPN Telecom: excelleren in bureaucratiseren |
|
KPN is een risicomijdend bedrijf. Daarom probeert deze onderneming sms'jes te verkopen door ze te laten aanprijzen door een swingende gospelneger. Had het bedrijf lef gehad, dan voerden ze een woest dansende imam op met een roedel AK-47's dragende Arabieren erachter, maar dat werd blijkbaar te gewaagd geacht. En ach, van de enkele conservatieve christen die zich stoort aan het gelijkstellen van een sms-berichtje met dé Boodschap, heb je weinig te vrezen.
Met diezelfde risicomijdende geest kreeg ik gisteren te maken. Voor het weekblad Elsevier werk ik aan een verhaal met gadgets (suggesties zijn overigens hier welkom), en daarin wilde ik KPN's UMTS-card, waarmee je mobiel snel kunt internetten, opnemen. Ik verzocht KPN om een recensie-exemplaar, op aanraden van Vincent Everts, aan wie overigens hartelijke dank voor alle overige ideeën.
Een mailtje van KPN met het verzoek dit contract even te ondertekenen, was het resultaat. Lees en huiver: KPN heeft 5 (vijf) pagina's nodig om op te schrijven dat je het geleende kaartje a) eerlijk moet teruggeven, b) niet mag mollen, c) alleen mag gebruiken via het KPN-netwerk, oftewel niet in het buitenland. Het wordt me opeens duidelijk waarom de telefoniemarkt zoveel efficiënter is geworden sinds de liberalisering.
Als u me nu excuseert, ik ga even Vodafone bellen.
|
15:56 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
Tuesday, August 17, 2004
Ehm, waarom heet het hier ook weer 'Bos en Lommer'? |
|
Ik ben net Idéfix, vroeger kon ik al niet tegen het kappen van bomen. En wat voor relatie dit eco-vandalisme heeft met de herbestrating van de wijk, snap ik ook al niet. Voor de duidelijkheid: die bomen waren tot dusver niet ingeklinkerd.
|
12:39 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
Monday, August 16, 2004
'Bloed en autobommen' |
|
Is datgene waarmee islamitische terroristen Nederland bedreigen. Nou, dan zitten we in mijn straat de komende acht weken veilig. Zo lang duren namelijk de werkzaamheden in de Heer Halewijnstraat.
|
12:10 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
Saturday, August 14, 2004
Friday, August 13, 2004
Misdaden tegen de menselijkheid |
|
Het wil er bij mij best in dat je, door socio-economische omstandigheden gedwongen en wat dies meer zij, voedsel gaat jatten teneinde jezelf en je nakomelingen te laven en te spijzigen.
Daar heb ik begrip voor, zelfs als het gaat om een Twents donker volkoren belegd met gesneden Mexicaanse kipfilet van de Dirk en Hellman's Mayonnaise er bovenop.
Maar ook van een dief mag je verwachten dat hij bepaalde elementaire waarden hoog houdt. Van sommige dingen moet je gewoon afblijven. En voor criminelen die een jellybeans-fabriek overvallen, is zelfs de negende cirkel van de hel nog niet erg genoeg.
|
12:33 |
permalink comment(s) (2) |
Sunday, August 8, 2004
Uitnodiging: Zacht Ei-feest op 21 augustus |
|
En wel aan het water, met een barbecue, voldoende vloeistoffen om al het verbrande vlees mee weg te spoelen, en voor wie echt vervelend wordt, een gratis zwemles temidden van de blauwalg in de Gaasperplas. Locatie: Langbroekpad 2 in Amsterdam. Tijd: einde van de middag tot diep in de nacht. After party met een fles absinth te huize Dasselaar behoort daarna tot de mogelijkheden.
De redenen tot feest staan hier omschreven.
Iedereen is in principe uitgenodigd, maar het aantal plaatsen is beperkt. Daarom: first come, first serve. Wil je komen, stuur me dan een e-mail met het antwoord op de volgende vragen:
Ik ben:
• Een gegrilde-dodedierenonderdeleneter
• Iemand met anti-evolutionaire instincten die niet weet waar hij zijn hoektanden voor heeft
Ik drink:
• Suiker met koolzuur
• Gegist graan
• Gegist druivensap
• Gedistilleerd graan
• Gedistilleerd druivensap
• Accuzuur
Ik kom naar de Gaasperplas en neem mee:
• Mezelf
• Iemand uit de kroeg
• Mijn levensgezel
• Een gevarieerd assortiment micro-organismen
De eerste twee regels van het Amerikaanse volkslied zijn:
• Die Fahne hoch, die Reihen fest geschlossen
• Oh say can you see, by the dawn's early light
• Eens als de bazuinen klinken, uit de hoogte links en rechts
• Ik ben Bert, ik Ernie
Oh, en vergeet je naam niet.
Gedetailleerde routebeschrijvingen worden ongeveer een week van tevoren verstuurd naar degenen die zich hebben aangemeld. De rest kan het er op wagen, en na het verdwalen altijd nog 06-45190498 bellen.
|
23:30 |
permalink comment(s) (2) |
Bij de Groningse politie werken watjes |
|
Hoe is het anders te verklaren dat een motoragent eerst (met te weinig afstand) een tijdje achter je rijdt, vervolgens je tergend langzaam inhaalt, en daarna zijn weg vervolgt, zonder je even aan de kant te zetten vanwege dat ernstig op een (verboden) radardetector gelijkende doosje dat met zuignappen aan de voorruit zit?
|
23:09 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
Wednesday, August 4, 2004
Aandachtoverload |
|
En dan bedoel ik vooral een 'vragen om aandacht'-overload.
Zo'n tien tot twintig keer per dag gaat hier de telefoon terwijl op de nummerherkenner de getallen '0000000000' verschijnen, ten teken dat de beller ervoor kiest om zijn nummer geheim te houden.
Zo'n tien tot twintig keer per dag laat ik de telefoon dan rustig overgaan totdat het antwoordapparaat aanslaat (ach, hadden de Taliban er maar eentje gehad).
Geheid dat er niets wordt ingesproken, want vrijwel altijd betreft het een call center (dat je een hele goede morgen, middag of avond wenst).
Het is een van de nadelen van een bestaan als zelfstandig ondernemer: de Kamer van Koophandel hoereert je telefoonnummer door aan iedereen die daar een paar eurocent voor over heeft.
Dat ga ik toch ook eens in het Amsterdamse uitgaansleven proberen.
Zou er vraag zijn naar voorbedrukte bierviltjes met mijn nummer erop?
|
15:32 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
Tuesday, August 3, 2004
Spannende gebeurtenis in huize Dasselaar! |
|
Jawel! Een nieuwe tandenborstel! Met knipperend lampje!
(Als u me nu even excuseert, want ik moet mijn verzameling Tiroler wandelstokspeldjes nog op alfabetische volgorde leggen.)
|
20:49 |
permalink comment(s) (2) |
Burp |
|
Sja, wat doe je als rechtgeaard journalist als je bij het schrijven van een artikel over cognac toevallig bij Neerlands grootste importeur van de Groene ThFee terechtkomt?
Inderdaad: je zet de fles heel stoer in de vensterbank en hebt er na een week nog geen druppel van gedronken. Bestaat er ook een alcoholgewenningskliniek?
|
19:56 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
Saturday, July 31, 2004
Wednesday, July 28, 2004
Redenen om witbier te kopen |
|
Prediker 8:15: 'Daarom prees ik de blijdschap, dewijl de mens niets beters heeft onder de zon, dan te eten, en te drinken, en blijde te zijn.'
U ziet, de bijbel is een enorme troost als je de boekhouding moet bijwerken.
|
17:43 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
Monday, July 26, 2004
Drank maakt meer kapot dan je lief is |
|
Je mailbox bijvoorbeeld, omdat een mevrouw van Allied Domecq Benelux (bekend van Courvoisier en ander spul dat de komende eeuw niet meer in mijn bar aan te treffen zal zijn) je een bericht stuurt met ruim 50 megabyte aan attachments. Enfin, ruim een uurtje knutselen met webmail later deed alles het weer - en er waren maar twee urgente mailtjes waar ik dientengevolge te laat op reageerde. Grom. Bries. Snuif. (Ja, ik weet het, uitkijken voor een type A-persoonlijkheid.)
|
17:18 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
Saturday, July 24, 2004
Dingen waar ik enorm de besmettelijke ziekte aan heb |
|
Om nu gelijk met woorden als 'takkentyfus' te beginnen, vind ik ook zo grof, en bovendien biologisch niet juist, aangezien de tyfus over het algemeen heel weinig takken treft, hoewel dat wellicht het gebrek aan groen in Amsterdam zou verklaren als dat wel het geval zou zijn (ja, ik mik nog steeds op de Thomas Mann Award 2004).
Eenderweg, daat gaat 'ie.
• Call center-medewerkers die je 'een hele goede morgen toewensen', waarbij de overdreven vriendelijkheid bedoeld is om te maskeren dat ze eigenlijk 'hels' in plaats van 'hele' bedoelen
• Daaraan gekoppeld: mensen die, gedeformeerd door al die telefonische stalkers, thans denken dat je iets komt verkopen als je volledig gemeend vraagt of je telefoontje gelegen komt
• Barf-aria, een bier dat ik nooit meer koop, ook niet als het weer bij Appie in de aanbieding is
• Mensen die zeggen te zullen bellen om te melden of ze nog even langskomen, en - inderdaad - niet bellen
• Een eenvoudig te monteren handsfree-set die alleen met behulp van industrieel gereedschap in je auto blijkt te plaatsen
• Mysterieus doende types die je toevoegen aan MSN Messenger en zich niet willen voorstellen, terwijl het toch van essentieel belang is voor je gespreksprioritisering om te weten of het gaat om een atletisch blond meisje van begin twintig of een 120 kilo zware bouwvakker die kippen houdt, maar niet voor de eieren
• De drie obscure Italiaanse woorden op de kassabon van de supermarkt die bij nader inzien de lamsspiesjes blijken te omschrijven
• Die Polo 1.4 die zonder richting aan te geven me rechts inhaalde terwijl ik op de linkerrijbaan vast zat achter een (uiteraard) veel te sloom rijdende Opel die het inhalen op de legale manier niet echt prettiger maakte
Gelukkig lachte de cassière vriendelijk, want anders had ik nu niet zo'n opgeruimd humeur gehad.
|
22:45 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
Thursday, July 22, 2004
Losse overwegingen |
|
• Er zitten veel te veel functies op de Sony Ericsson P900
• Het is niet grappig om in het instructieboekje van je Seat te lezen dat je H4-lampen moet hebben, om er na aankoop én het verbreken van het ruilzegel achter te komen dat de dealer, die in Zwolle zit, je het boekje van een verkeerd, minder luxe model Ibiza heeft meegegeven, waarna je extra-witte lampjes dus bij 't grof vuil kunnen aangezien je geen 20 euri diesel gaat verstoken om eenzelfde bedrag aan lampjes te reclameren bij voornoemde autoboer (deze zin doet mee aan de Thomas Mann Award 2004, waar louter op zinslengte wordt getoetst)
• Mijn sportschool moet meer lelijke vrouwen als klant werven, want de huidige populatie leidt enorm af (toegegeven, je traint er wel harder door)
• Een James Bond-achtige auto met doelgeleide raketten zou de doorstroming in Amsterdam-West aardig kunnen bevorderen, vooral als de medelander voor je met 15 km/u weigert aangespoord te worden door vriendelijk geclaxoneer
• Een locatie voor het eerste Zacht Ei-feest is gevonden: nabij de Gaasperplas. Binnenkort meer informatie.
|
23:11 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
Monday, July 19, 2004
Muggen steken niet |
|
Althans niet de verslaggeefster van uitkeringstrekkersblad MUG, een periodiek dat ik gisteren meenam van de sportschool omdat er een blond meisje op de voorkant stond. Het bleek Sjaan Duinhoven te zijn, van wie ik nog nooit had gehoord, maar die schijnt te actreutelen in de tv-serie Bitch, welk scheldwoord een geuzennaam is geworden voor de hedendaagse vrouw die daarmee het initiatief voor haar eenzaamheid in elk geval semantisch gezien in eigen hand houdt.
Anyway. Als je alle woorden schrapt die niet als strekking hadden 'Ik ben dan wel mooi maar ook heel bijzonder', telde het verhaal exact nul woorden. Toch was er een pagina voor nodig, waarbij alleen de foto de voor het drukken van dit krantje benodigde ontbossing nog enigszins zinvol maakte. Boeren in Twente riepen vroeger (en wellicht nog) op de kermis domweg 'tieten!', maar zo onbeschaafd ben ik natuurlijk niet. Desondanks is het journalistiek onvergeeflijk dat de MUG-verslaggeefster na Duinhoven's uitdagend bedoelde uitspraak 'Zullen we het nu eens over mijn seksleven hebben?', abrupt afhaakt. En dat feministen deze angst en dit gebrek aan respect voor de seksualiteit van een volwassen vrouw (19!) niet als een affront ervaren, steekt des te meer.
Het moest niet mogen, anno 2004.
|
22:30 |
permalink comment(s) (4) |
Friday, July 16, 2004
Erwin Kroll bij het ontbijt |
|
's Ochtends ben ik toch al nooit zo gezellig, maar dat wordt er niet beter op als Erwin Kroll het weerbericht presenteert. Die man spreekt klinkers uit zoals het Nederlands elftal doelpunten maakt: in de verlenging.
'En in het nooooorden ziieen we dat...'
Wat moet het irritant zijn voor de familie Kroll om op die manier te ontbijten:
'Pak jiiiiij eeeven de pindaaakaaas uit de kaast?'
'Ja pap.'
|
9:13 |
permalink comment(s) (1) |
Sunday, July 11, 2004
Niets onmenselijks is mij vreemd |
|
Nog altijd werkend aan een artikel over eetstoornissen las ik over een man die zakken chips, bakken ijs en pakken koekjes wegwerkte, om vervolgens de boel er weer uit te werken op een manier die vermoedelijk geen toelichting behoeft.
Het is wellicht een uiting van (on)gezond sadisme dat ik van het schrijven van dit verhaal enorm veel trek kreeg in chips, ijs en koekjes.
|
22:43 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
Ironie |
|
Met een bord kipkluifjes naast je aan een verhaal over eetstoornissen werken. (Sorry, ik had honger...)
|
12:29 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
Saturday, July 10, 2004
Nuon-scrabble |
|
De jaarlijkse energieafrekening is er weer. Vol raadsels en nieuwe woorden. Eerst de woorden maar, die duidelijk maken dat er qua 'transparantie op de energiemarkt' nog wel wat te verbeteren valt:
• REB-elektriciteit
• MEP-heffing (ik word er inderdaad vrij agressief van)
• Meetdienst
• WVO
Dan de raadsels nog. Kan iemand me vertellen waarom mijn gasverbruik met 1,026 wordt vermenigvuldigd omdat ik zogenaamd extra-verrijkt gas zou ontvangen (nog rijker dan vorig jaar, want toen was de factor 1,025)? Nog zoiets vreemds: de jaarrekening bevat een meerjarenoverzicht van het verbruik van 2002 tot en met 2004. Maar vreemd genoeg verschillen de getallen stuk voor stuk (marginaal, weliswaar) van die in het meerjarenoverzicht op de rekening van 2003.
De toelichting in de kantlijn geeft het antwoord: de getallen zijn omgerekend naar standaardjaren (die blijkbaar van jaar tot jaar verschillen) om alles beter vergelijkbaar te maken. Inderdaad. Glashelder zo. Ik ga maar eens een hamster kopen.
|
13:21 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
Sunday, July 4, 2004
Juridische hulp gevraagd |
|
Wie (onder de gemiddeld ruim 300 (dit weekend ruim 400, met dank aan MKT) dagelijkse unieke bezoekers van deze site) heeft én juridische expertise op het gebied van aansprakelijkheidswetgeving, én zin om enkele minuten van zijn of haar tijd aan me op te offeren?
Wat er exact aan de hand is, zal ik hier niet posten, maar het gaat om een akkefietje waarbij ik schade heb geleden en zal lijden door het aantoonbaar verkeerde advies van een derde partij die ik had ingehuurd om me te assisteren in een vakgebied waar ik geen sjoege van heb. Op grond van gesprekken met twee van zijn branchegenoten is me bovendien duidelijk geworden dat het hier gaat om grove nalatigheid. Zij kunnen eventueel als getuige-deskundige optreden.
U vat hem al: de schade wil ik verhalen op deze derde partij. Reacties graag per e-mail naar het adres in de linkermenubalk bij 'Courriel'. (En nee, 't heeft niets met de auto te maken. Al was dit me het weekje wel.)
Behalve mijn eeuwige dank wil ik de vriendelijke helper graag een exemplaar van mijn boek in het vooruitzicht stellen. En een reep chocolade naar keuze (familietraditie).
|
21:32 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
Deuk |
|
Toen ik mijn auto net had, dacht ik steeds dat er deuken in zaten. De metallic lak in combinatie met de soms vreemde lichtinval zorgden voor bedrieglijke reflecties. Gaandeweg ben ik daaraan gewend geraakt.
En dus is het me waarschijnlijk niet gelijk opgevallen dat hij echt beschadigd was. (De Oranjekots hielp ook niet.)
Daar kwam ik gisteren achter, toen ik voor het eerst sinds woensdag de auto gebruikte.
Niet alleen waren beide spiegels beschadigd, ook bleken in de bovenkant van de motorkap twee forse deuken te zitten.
Ik heb zelf wel eens een deuk in mijn auto gereden, en daar kan ik goed mee leven. Dat was mijn schuld, en dus heb ik daarvan de consequenties te dragen.
Maar dat ik de komende jaren misschien meer premie moet betalen, plus nu in elk geval een eigen risico, vanwege de vernielzucht van een reltrappend jochie (m/v) of een klungelende inbreker, is van een andere orde.
Nu de bumper toch al loszit, adviseer ik die persoon dan ook er voorlopig niet voor te gaan lopen.
|
17:02 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
Friday, July 2, 2004
Nee hoor, wij hebben geen communistische planeconomie |
|
(Wat hieronder staat is natuurlijk volledig fictief.)
Er was eens een man die na een lange reis rond de wereld besloot om vrij te blijven. Hij weigerde wat aanbiedingen voor een baan, vestigde zich in Amsterdam en verwierf al snel genoeg klanten om fatsoenlijk van te leven. Zoals zoveel zelfstandig ondernemers verzekerde hij zich particulier tegen ziektekosten.
Totdat de Belastingdienst hem dat verbood.
De man kwam er al snel achter waarom. Nederland kent een regel die zegt dat zelfstandig ondernemers zich verplicht moeten verzekeren via het Ziekenfonds als ze minder dan een bepaald bedrag verdienen.
Toch snapte de man iets niet. Want zijn inkomen lag boven de Ziekenfondsgrens. Waarom zou hij dan een staatsgesubsidieerde verzekering opgelegd moeten krijgen, die de overheid nog extra geld kon kostten ook? Was deze regel er niet voor de vertrapten der aarde?
Het bleek dat de Belastingdienst niet keek naar het gemiddelde van zijn inkomen, maar naar het inkomen in de hobbelende eerste maanden van zijn bedrijfje. Dat was niet logisch, maar het was nu eenmaal de wet. Zelfs de Hoge Raad vond dat pure kolder, maar concludeerde dat deze kolder blijkbaar was wat de wetgever had bedoeld. Conform de leer van de Trias Politica concludeerde de Raad (terecht) in de zaken 36558, 36621 en 36642 dat zij er dan niets over te zeggen had. Montesquieu dien je serieus te nemen.
En dus moest de man het Ziekenfonds in, waarvoor hij een premie diende te betalen die was gebaseerd op zijn huidige inkomen, dat blijkbaar opeens wel van belang was nu er geld afgedragen diende te worden, maar niet meetelde bij de afweging óf hij dat geld moest afdragen.
(Het sprookje eindigt triest.)
De verantwoordelijke minister, de VVD'er Hans Hoogervorst, wenste niet in te grijpen, formeel omdat er niets mis met de wet zou zijn, maar feitelijk (kritiek was er wel degelijk) omdat het Ziekenfonds over 1,5 jaar toch zou verdwijnen. Principes zijn mooi, maar gemakzucht is beter.
De man in kwestie droeg daarom voortaan maandelijks bijna twee keer zoveel premie af voor een met overheidsgeld gesubsidieerd product dat hem een minder goede dekking bood dan wat hij op de vrije markt kon krijgen, en dat oorspronkelijk bedoeld was voor mensen die het financieel minder breed hebben dan hij, terwijl er een particulier alternatief zonder staatssteun voorhanden was dat hem én de overheid dus minder zou kosten, maar waarbij hij zich niet mocht vervoegen.
Uiteindelijk emigreerde hij naar een land met een minder geleide economie, alwaar de sigaren goedkoper waren en je voor 200 dollar een nieuwe lever kon kopen.
(Ja, lieve kijkbuiskinderen, ome Zacht Ei is zich goed des duivels aan het maken. Zozeer zelfs dat hij zich doelbewust bediend van contaminaties. Godfried Bomans nogantoe.)
|
20:28 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
Koop geen Acer-laptop |
|
De mensen van DHL kennen me inmiddels heel goed. Ik heb ze de afgelopen tijd zes keer gezien. Want tot drie keer toe gaf de ingebouwde muis van mijn Acer TravelMate 800 het op, en keer op keer werden de problemen niet gefixt. En de laatste keer hield ook het toetsenbord er mee op, zodat ik zat te computeren met een USB-toetsenbord en dito muis. Lekker mobiel, inderdaad.
Nu lijkt het erop dat het ding weer naar behoren werkt, maar de vraag is voor hoe lang. Zeker als ik deze fijne discussie bij Tweakers zie.
En als Acer je nu gewoon een nieuwe en betere (dat wil zeggen: werkende) laptop aanbood. Maar nee.
Zijn er nog concurrenten van Acer die, in ruil voor een nieuwe laptop, willen dat ik dit apparaat ritueel in de fik steek?
|
11:27 |
permalink comment(s) (1) |
Thursday, June 24, 2004
Hij komt |
|
En dan heb ik het niet over mijn geslachtsrijpe kater, maar over de SonyEricsson P900. Die ik vandaag, na lang dralen, toch maar heb besteld. Binnenkort neem ik dus afscheid van mijn zo'n beetje nog op stoomkracht werkende Motorola Timeport, destijds een van de eerste tribands. Rouwfestiviteiten zullen op deze site worden aangekondigd.
|
13:11 |
permalink comment(s) (1) |
Tuesday, June 1, 2004
Van Toru naar Arvo |
|
Toru Takemitsu was een Japanse componist die ik leerde kennen in de periode dat ik nog fanatiek klassiek gitaar studeerde. John Williams (de gitarist, niet te verwarren met de filmcomponist), destijds mijn grote held, speelde regelmatig stukken van Takemitsu, die zich laten samenvatten als minimalistisch impressionisme. Of, zoals Williams ooit zei, vermoedelijk in een parafrasering van Takemitsu zelf: 'The essence of sound is in its dying away.'
Toen ik Takemitsu aan een mede-weblogger liet horen, kwam ze met de naam van Arvo Pärt, een componist uit Estland. Vanmiddag heb ik het verzamelde werk van Pärt sinds 1991 maar eens opgezet. Prachtig hoe iemand met zo weinig noten zoveel kan zeggen. Takemitsu, behalve componist ook auteur van het nauwelijks nog verkrijgbare boek 'Confronting Silence', zou trots op hem zijn.
|
15:43 |
permalink comment(s) (2) |
Tuesday, May 18, 2004
Peace through superior firepower |
|
Oftewel, een deel van de redenen waarom ik aan vechtsport doe, als omschreven in dit artikel op een Amerikaanse Wing Chun-site.
Als u van de Karate Kid-achtige wijsheden bent, dan volstaat wellicht het enige Oosterse citaat uit het stuk: 'Avoid violence for this (avoidance) is the way of the strong. The man who cannot be drawn into a fight can never be fought. If he cannot be fought, he cannot be defeated. If he cannot be defeated, he is invincible.'
(Persoonlijk hou ik het er meer op dat de gozer die me vanavond een tand door de lip sloeg, volgende week alsnog tegen de vlakte gaat. Pax vobis.)
|
22:46 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
Friday, May 14, 2004
Always Coca-Cola |
|
En nu we toch inkijkjes in het privéleven aan het geven zijn, kan dit er ook nog wel bij: mijn oma, die inmiddels weer enigszins lijkt te herstellen (afkloppen) van een fikse longontsteking.
Als u zich afvraagt waarom ik deze week een afspraak met u heb afgezegd, dan is dit (tezamen met de perikelen rond Ender) de reden.
|
11:08 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
Thursday, May 13, 2004
Frikandellen |
|
De uitstekende artsen van het Diergeneeskundig Orthopedisch Centrum Amsterdam (DOCA) zijn even vriendelijk en vakkundig als duur. Vandaag is Ender geopereerd aan het gebroken heupgewricht dat hij gisteren na een aanrijding opliep. Krap 850 euro, daar heb je een hele hoop frikandellen voor, maar ook een opgeknapte kat. En als ik te weten kom welk stuk verdriet Ender heeft aangereden, komen die frikandellen alsnog wel. Grrr.
Dit is Ender terwijl hij nog deels in de narcose zit. Even later zal een medewerkster van het DOCA hem nog wat extra narcose-antagonist geven zodat hij wat wakkerder wordt.
Ender heeft zijn tong weer geparkeerd daar waar hij hoort.
Zo ken ik hem weer. Net een dikke twee uur narcose achter de rug, en alweer een grote smoel. (Komt u maar met de grappen waarom we het zo goed met elkaar kunnen vinden.)
Daarnet ben ik pas thuisgekomen: Ender moet namelijk verplicht zes weken rust houden. Springen, rennen, klimmen, spelen: het is tijdelijk uit den boze. Ik heb dus een grote hondenbench gekocht, een soort kooi waarin hij toch nog wat bewegingsruimte heeft. Helaas betekende dat een van files vergeven rit naar Schoonhoven, de enige plek waar ik zo'n ding op korte termijn kon krijgen. Vergeeft u het me dus dat ik het voor vandaag even hier bij laat.
|
23:27 |
permalink comment(s) (3) |
Over slechte dierenartsen en dingen die voorbij gaan |
|
Dat hoop je dan althans, in dit geval. Gistermorgen trof ik mijn kat aangereden aan. Dierenarts Geerling aan de Admiraal de Ruyterweg zit toevallig het dichtst bij mij in de buurt en dus ging de reis daarheen.
Had ik eerst zijn naam maar bij Google ingetikt, in plaats van achteraf, toen ik met omhoogstekend nekhaar weer thuiskwam (en niet alleen omdat ik me zorgen maakte om Ender). De beschrijvingen van Geerling op de site van Merel Roze zijn bepaald niet vleiend, en daar is een goede reden voor, weet ik nu uit eigen ervaring.
|
23:21 |
permalink comment(s) (2) |
Sunday, May 9, 2004
Wie domme vragen stelt |
|
Een deurbel op zondag terwijl je niemand verwacht, betekent meestal een roedel Jehova's.
Omdat ik net honger had, deed ik toch open.
Een vrouw met een postuur waaruit nogal duidelijk bleek dat niet iedereen van het kijken naar Kylie Minogue en Kate Moss acuut anorexia krijgt, stond aan de andere kant.
"Jij bent niet wie ik had verwacht."
Die reactie kende ik dan wel weer, van een vrouw.
Oh, was mijn antwoord. (Ik ben en blijf een Tukker.)
"Deed je de deur open omdat ik belde?" vroeg ze.
Omdat ik een politiek-correct mens ben, probeer ik vrouwen meestal te behandelen alsof ze intelligente wezens zijn. (Dit in tegenstelling tot van domheid blijkgevende mannen. Ik ben dan ook heteroseksueel.)
In dit geval kon ik me echter niet beheersen:
"Nee, ik loop om de minuut naar de voordeur om te kijken of er iemand staat."
Het "oh ja" en "hi, hi" galmde nog lang na in het trapportaal terwijl ze naarstig op zoek ging naar de snelste ontsnappingsroute uit de Heer Halewijnstraat.
|
23:07 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
Saturday, May 8, 2004
Oef |
|
De toestand waarin het lichaam net wat minder suiker heeft om te verbranden dan het prettig vindt, heet hypoglycemie.
Vreemd genoeg kreeg ik daar vanmiddag om half zes opeens last van, toen ik na een uur met nuchtere maag rossen op de crosstrainer bedacht dat het misschien toch beter is om ontbijt en lunch niet over te slaan als je gaat sporten.
Maakt u zich niet ongerust, de duizeligheid is inmiddels weg, en de 897 verbrande kilocalorieën zijn weer aangevuld.
|
20:30 |
permalink comment(s) (3) |
Wednesday, May 5, 2004
Bevrijdingsdag-inkopen |
|
Ruim 32 uur documentaires over de Tweede Wereldoorlog op tien kloeke (nou ja) dvd's. Ja, bij proletenwinkel Makro hebben ze soms best aardige aanbiedingen.
(Voordat u zich ernstige zorgen gaat maken over het overmatig serieuze gehalte van mijn bestaan: de Makro had ook seizoen 7 van BtVS im Sonderangebot. Habe ich auch geklaut... gekauft, selbstverständlich. Buffy rules megaopenhaardkoor, toen dat laatste woord nog mocht.)
|
21:34 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
Friday, April 30, 2004
Niemand houdt van mij, boehoe |
|
Want wat is dat toch met mijn naam dat zelfs mensen die het voor elkaar krijgen om deze in het e-mailadres goed te schrijven, bij de aanhef van een e-mail dan alsnog de fout ingaan? Zoals vanochtend, naar aanleiding van een artikel van joors troelie in NRC Handelsblad over foto's afdrukken:
> -----Oorspronkelijk bericht-----
> Van: H.É.E.E.N. Schuilnaam
> Verzonden: vrijdag 30 april 2004 0:45
> Aan: arjan@zachtei.nl
> Onderwerp: Internetlinks in artikel: 'De drogist drukt goedkoper'
>
> Beste Arjen,
Voortaan heet ik Frits, dat u het even weet.
|
11:54 |
permalink comment(s) (1) |
Tuesday, April 27, 2004
Zen en de kunst van het motorkaponderhoud |
|
Eenieder die mijn auto kent - dat wil zeggen: iedereen die wel eens rechts rijdt op de A1 - weet dat ik dol ben op het ding. Vandaar ook dat ik gisteravond niet zo blij was toen ik m'n Ibiza (1.9 TDi (rode i), sportonderstel, 110 pk-motor) startte:
*kloink ratel kling*
Het geluid verdween weer - totdat ik een bocht instuurde:
*schuur rammel knerssss*
Ik besloot de rit voortijdig te beëindigen en deed de motorkap open.
(Al rijdend wil dat niet, tenzij je een cabrio hebt en erg lenig bent.)
Helaas voor de dealer: toen bleek dat de stang die de motorkap moet ondersteunen, los was geschoten en tegen de radiator aanlag.
Auto en eigenaar maken het inmiddels weer goed. Bezoek is welkom (niet van 12.00-14.00, dan slapen we).
|
11:36 |
permalink comment(s) (1) |
Monday, April 26, 2004
Voer oorlog, geen eendjes |
|
En dan vooral ook omdat de geweren waarmee we waren uitgerust, geen stukjes brood konden afschieten, en ik me daarnaast afvroeg of Assendelftse woerden wel zo geïnteresseerd waren in een capsule met verf. Ja, paintball is een fijne besteding van de zondagmiddag.
|
12:53 |
permalink comment(s) (2) |
Saturday, April 17, 2004
Friday, April 16, 2004
Nu maar hopen dat er geen houtworm in zit |
|
Degenen onder u die wel eens met mij hebben ontbeten, weten dat ik van ouderwetsch degelijck brood houd (hout?). Welnu, gelukkig heeft Makro (in de volksmond ook wel de Makro genoemd) een variant met echt hout. Straks ook bolletjes met FSC-keurmerk?
|
22:57 |
permalink comment(s) (3) |
Zomermode voor rechtse rakkers |
|
Om de teksten te lezen: even op het plaatje klikken. Moet te doen zijn.
|
13:11 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
Monday, April 12, 2004
Verdrink je innerlijke kind |
|
Ooit studeerde ik psychologie. Om een aantal redenen ben ik daarmee opgehouden. Deze ex-marinier beschrijft er eentje van. (De rest licht ik desgewenst nog wel een keer toe bij veel drank.)
|
16:49 |
permalink comment(s) (1) |
Saturday, April 3, 2004
Zo, dat houdt de communisten wel weg |
|
Tegen vampiers gebruik je knoflook, en tegen linkse rakkers...
Bovendien was die slaapkamermuur toch wat kaal.
(Wie de wetten van Murphy en de foto van San Francisco wil zien, klikke op bovenstaand plaatje.)
|
10:59 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
Thursday, April 1, 2004
De beste 1 april-grap van 2004 |
|
Ik kijk televisie via een Dreambox, een satellietontvanger op basis van een Linux-pc. Het is een apparaat van nerds, voor nerds, en er is een actieve hobbyistengemeenschap die zelf software voor het ding schrijft.
En dat hebben ze ook gedaan voor 1 april.
Een van de heren die regelmatig software voor de Dreambox aanlevert, publiceerde afgelopen zaterdag zijn nieuwste versie voor het Dreambox-besturingssysteem. Zogenaamd omdat er het nodige aan te verbeteren viel, maar in werkelijkheid omdat er een programmaatje in zat dat vandaag actief zou worden.
En inderdaad, want mijn televisie was vanavond niet op één zender te houden, maar sprong om de zoveel seconden automatisch naar een van de Taquila-zenders, een Spaans filmkanaal.
Vervolgens meldden andere samenzweerders op een Dreambox-discussieforum ook nog dat hier sprake zou zijn van een satellietsignaal dat het interne geheugen finaal overhoop zou halen - wat minder ongeloofwaardig is dan het klinkt, want de Dreambox is een apparaat voor hobbyisten, en erg kwetsbaar - en de paniek was compleet.
Totdat ze deze link de wereld instuurden.
|
22:25 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
Tuesday, March 30, 2004
Monday, March 29, 2004
Into the great wide open |
|
Op weblogs is het de gewoonte om af en toe de lezer te vermoeien met allerlei geestelijke noden die vooral de eigenaar van het weblog wat aangaan/interesseren, en de rest van de wereld meestal geen ene moer.
Welnu, wie ben ik om met een traditie te breken.
More...
|
15:40 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
Thursday, March 25, 2004
Tuesday, March 16, 2004
Hoe ethiek geld kan kosten |
|
Of ik een dagvoorzitterschap op me wou nemen: een klusje dat met een paar uur werk een flink bedrag oplevert. Alleen jammer dat de potentiële opdrachtgever een grote internetaanbieder was - en het discussieonderwerp ook ICT betrof.
Voor NRC Handelsblad schreef ik vorig jaar een flink stuk over breedband-internetaanbieders. Meer in het algemeen komt meer dan de helft van mijn inkomen uit ICT-journalistiek. Daar gaat je geloofwaardigheid, voor 30 zilverlingen.
En toch blijft het jammer om nee te moeten zeggen.
Niettemin is het voordeel van ethisch gedrag dat je er met enig recht een plezierig zelfgenoegzaam gevoel aan overhoudt.
|
18:15 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
Sunday, March 14, 2004
Brak |
|
De auto is uitgedeukt terug, de kat blijkt eveneens schadevrij, en de ergste puinhoop thuis is opgeruimd. (Om dat effectief te doen, moet het huis eerst gesloopt worden, dus perfect is 't niet.)
Anyway, tijd om te gaan slapen.
|
19:41 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
Wednesday, March 10, 2004
Kleine wasjes |
|
ZE: 'Hello, this is room 434. I'd like to have some laundry picked up, please.'
Hotel: 'Sure sir, we can do that.'
ZE: 'Just one question though. I'm not familiar with these things, but are laundry bags supposed to be open at both sides?'
Hotel: 'No sir, that's not how it's supposed to be. I'll have a new one sent right up.'
Ik dacht, ik vraag maar...
|
2:03 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
Monday, March 1, 2004
Payback |
|
Ik ben snotverkouden, heb een door de spierpijn vastgeroeste nek en verder voel ik me ook al niet zo lekker. Bovendien gaat de reparatie van mijn auto 600 euro kosten. Tijd dus om facturen te gaan uitschrijven, dan voel ik me tenminste niet meer als enige ellendig.
(Nee, niets onmenselijks is mij vreemd.)
|
18:21 |
permalink comment(s) (3) |
Sunday, February 29, 2004
Opeens heb je het: |
|
Je wordt toch maar geen leraar, ondanks die vriendelijke brief van de Open Universiteit om je als oud-student aan te melden voor het 'traject zij-instromer'.
Twee observaties:
a) Blijkbaar denken ze dat oud-psychologie-studenten ook per definitie dol zijn op kinderen (volgens twee aloude Engelse wijsheden hou ik best van kinderen maar mits goed klaargemaakt, en nee, ik kan geen hele op. Overigens geef ik regelmatig les, maar dan aan volwassenen, en dat is erg leuk.)
b) De lerarennood is hoger dan ik dacht, als ze gesjeesde deeltijders gaan aanschrijven.
|
11:11 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
Friday, February 27, 2004
Patriottische kat |
|
Ik ben waarschijnlijk de laatste overgebleven Nederlander die niet anti-Amerikaans is. En omdat ik graag mag zingen (en nog grager alle Amerika-haters irriteer) gooi ik er met regelmaat een uitvoering van de Star-Spangled Banner tegenaan. Toch viel ik middenin de tweede regel stil toen ik dat vanochtend tijdens het werk deed. Kat Ender was naast me komen staan en begon fanatiek kopjes te geven. Ja, dat beest gaat het helemaal redden als ik hem ooit nog eens mee wil nemen naar de States.
|
11:51 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
Tuesday, February 24, 2004
Karma |
|
Tegenover het spotgoedkoop kunnen aanschaffen van deze en deze goede film hoort natuurlijk kosmische compensatie te staan. Geen wonder dus dat mijn fiets bij het verlaten van de winkel bleek te zijn gejat. Ik wens de gelukkige junk een bijzonder brakke portie versneden heroïne toe. Zo sportief ben ik dan ook wel weer.
|
23:32 |
permalink comment(s) (1) |
Saturday, February 21, 2004
We are such stuff |
|
As dreams are made on, aldus de Bard althans, en dat betekent dat ik gemaakt ben van watjes. Want vannacht droomde ik over... iemand die het voor elkaar gekregen had om zijn huiselektronica aan te sluiten op zijn digitale agenda.
Ik bedoel, hoeveel triester kan het worden?
Te mijner verdediging moet dan nog wel worden opgemerkt dat de droom zich afspeelde in het zonnige Californië, waar ik begin maart voor m'n werk naartoe ga. Hopelijk is er tijd om een uurtje te surfen op de Pacific (het soort surfen dat je doet met een stuk gehard plasticschuim), dan kan ik mijn reputatie in de weken erna wat opkrikken met dromen over het bedwingen van drie meter hoge golven. Enzo.
(Oh ja, en ik weet dat Prospero wat anders bedoelde. Maar de vorm wil ook wat.)
|
9:58 |
permalink comment(s) (1) |
Tuesday, February 17, 2004
Niet handig |
|
Om als je doodop bent van 1) een dag lesgeven, 2) een stevige intervaltraining hardlopen en 3) die vrachtwagen voor je in een nauwe straat waaruit mensen op hun dooie akkertje meubels staan uit te laden, de auto chagrijnig in zijn achteruit te zetten en vervolgens in redelijke vaart zo'n 250 meter achteruit te rijden. En daarbij dan langs een lantaarnpaal te schuren. Gevolg: schade aan achterspatbord, achterbumper en een kras van 20 centimeter op het rechterportier.
En in het kader van 'as is verbrande turf': as ik nou maar 10 km/u had gereden in plaats van 15, as ik nou maar even de auto stil had gezet en de meubelladers gemoedelijk had gadegeslagen, as ik die ontspannende buikademhalingstechnieken die ik ooit bij zangles heb geleerd nu maar had toegepast...
Helaas stook je met verbrande turf geen kachels. Vandaar dat ik mezelf maar eens ga opwarmen met een halve liter Australische rode wijn. De erkende zwarte spuitwerkplaats mag zich ondertussen bij mij melden. Een zweep om mezelf te flagelleren wegens deze enorme stupiditeit heb ik zelf al, dank voor uw belangstelling.
|
22:09 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
De hufters van UPC |
|
OK, een erg origineel thema is het niet, maar aan de andere kant is er ook iets te zeggen voor continuïteit: dat biedt enige stabiliteit in deze toch zo onzekere wereld. En daarom moet ik er misschien maar gewoon blij mee zijn dat ik vandaag een rekening kreeg van UPC over februari, ondanks 't feit dat ik per 1/2/04 heb opgezegd. Gelukkig trekt UPC van mijn internetrekening over februari (47,21) wel de borg voor het internetmodem af (45,38) zodat ik slechts 1,83 hoef te betalen voor een internetabonnement waar ik niet eens van zou kunnen genieten, omdat UPC het daarvoor benodigde modem zelf heeft teruggehaald.
|
21:03 |
permalink comment(s) (1) |
Monday, February 16, 2004
Het voordeel van een sauna |
|
Is dat je nog eens wat bijleert. Wist u bijvoorbeeld dat de koeien in Noord-Polen door een Hoofddorpse ondernemer worden voorzien van hun mineralen en vitamines, en dat deze (de vitamines, niet de koeien) zijn opgelost in het drinkwater, in plaats van (zoals normaal blijkbaar gebeurt) het vaste voer? En dat dit grote voordelen biedt ten opzichte van de laatstgenoemde methode, omdat de voedingswaarde van vast voer in de pens van de koe sterk wordt aangetast, terwijl water voor een flink deel ongehinderd kan passeren naar de maag van het beest?
Dat vermoedde ik al.
Gisteren was het nog boeiender, met een vrouwelijke metgezel door wie ik nu definitief weet dat mannen, of althans ik, zich helemaal niet bedreigd voelen door gedesinhibeerde vrouwen. Integendeel. In de woorden van George W.: Bring 'em on.
Gelukkig heb ik de OPZIJ niet als klant, want of die prijs stellen op zo'n enthousiaste pro-feministische ontboezeming, vraag ik me dan weer af.
En morgen weer zo'n fijne posting op Zacht Ei. We hebben er zin in.
|
22:49 |
permalink comment(s) (2) |
Wednesday, February 11, 2004
Welnee, Nederland verindividualiseert niet |
|
Want als dat zo was, had ik vanmiddag niet een kwartier hoeven te zoeken naar een parkeerplaats bij de menselijke bijenzwerm die IKEA heet, waar beide meubels die ik wou kopen, vervolgens ook nog uitverkocht bleken. Grom, snuif. Uiteraard ontdekte ik pas bij thuiskomst dit handige voorraadtooltje op de IKEA-site. Nu nog een parkeerplaats-reserveringsmogelijkheid.
|
17:15 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
Monday, February 2, 2004
UPC-medewerker snapt zelf ook niets van zijn baas |
|
Dat bleek vanochtend wel toen mijn kabelmodem werd opgehaald. Na zes jaren vol ergernis heb ik UPC namelijk ingeruild voor Demon (internet) en satelliet (radio/televee). Resteerde alleen nog het kleine detail van het modem, dat ik in bruikleen had en geretourneerd moest worden. Vanochtend belde daarom een UPC-medewerker aan, en ontstond de volgende dialoog:
Z.E.: "Wat moeten jullie eigenlijk met een zes jaar oud modem?"
UPC: "Dat flikkeren we op de schroothoop."
Z.E.: "Had ik dat zelf niet kunnen doen?"
UPC: "Ja, 't is eigenlijk krankzinnig, niet? Maar je krijgt zo in elk geval je borg terug."
Samenvattend: Om er zeker van te zijn dat de 91 euro borg die ik jaren geleden heb betaald, mij wel rechtens toekomt, spendeert UPC zo'n 50 euro extra (mijn schatting voor het arbeidsloon van de UPC-medewerker plus benzinekosten en afschrijving busje) om het modem op te halen en namens mij bij het vuil te zetten.
Moet ik nu nog een keer uitleggen waarom werkelijk vrije markten zo'n goed idee zijn?
|
13:39 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
Wednesday, January 28, 2004
Op stoom in de sauna |
|
Gisteravond zat ik in de sauna van mijn sportschool een paar kilo vocht kwijt te raken, teneinde de tocht naar de weegschaal de daaropvolgende ochtend zowel apocrief als plezierig te maken. In dezelfde ruimte zaten ook twee in handdoeken gewikkelde vrouwen. Nummer één begon een op een dialoog gelijkende monoloog richting nummer twee.
'Van de week zaten hier wat jongens met hun onderbroek aan. Daar heb ik wat van gezegd, want ik vind dat niet kunnen.'
Daar zat wat in. In de sauna behoor je, op een handdoek na, naakt te zijn en anders moet je opkachelen. Bij één bepaalde bezoekersgroep (die ik niet bij naam noem want voor je het weet heb je Indymedia op je nek) is de gewoonte om in witte onderbroeken naar binnen te hossen, er echter nauwelijks uit te timmeren. Haar ergernis leek me logisch, en ik deelde 'm.
'Bovendien, weet je, behalve dat het onhygiënisch is - ik voel me er gewoon niet prettig bij. Je voelt je als vrouw toch al kwetsbaarder en dan zit je hier naakt, terwijl zo'n jongen dan een onderbroek draagt.'
De witte Zeeman-onderbroek, symbool van vrouwelijke onderdrukking!
Vanavond publieke verbranding van dit duivelse textiel in het Erasmuspark. Niet aansteken met Molotov-cocktails, dat was ook een man.
Ondertussen regel ik een praatgroep voor onze emotioneel niet serieus genomen, preutse nieuwe medelanders.
|
19:21 |
permalink comment(s) (1) |
Monday, January 26, 2004
Klantvriendelijkheid in Nederland |
|
Z.E.: "Goedemiddag, met Arjan Dasselaar. Ik wil graag weten wat een jaarabonnement bij jullie sportschool kost."
Sportschool: "Die informatie geven wij niet over de telefoon."
Z.E.: < valt verbijsterd stil >
Sportschool: "Bent u daar nog?"
Z.E.: "Mag ik vragen waarom niet?"
Sportschool: "Nou, we hebben liever dat de mensen hier komen, dan kunnen we ze alles eromheen een beetje uitleggen."
Niet alleen in de politiek, maar zelfs in het Nederlandse zakenleven horen betutteling en 'wij weten wel wat goed voor u is' er blijkbaar helemaal bij. Of zijn de tarieven bij Healthcenter Sloterpark zo hoog dat ze alleen kunnen worden meegedeeld als er een 'vergrendel-alle-deuren-en-ramen-knop' in de buurt is teneinde weghollende potentiële klanten te behouden?
Update 19.24: ik ben toch maar wel lid geworden. En wel vanwege het nerdvriendelijke computergestuurde trainingsprogramma met je eigen chipcard. Zeg daar maar eens nee tegen.
|
14:36 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
Sunday, January 25, 2004
Concurreer eens een Turk eruit |
|
Ik woon alweer een jaartje of vijf in het mooie Bos en Lommer. Wie Amsterdam kent, weet dat daar veel allochtonen wonen. Dat heeft als consequentie dat het hier stikt van de op Turksat gerichte satellietoortjes. Als je dus zelf besluit een schotel op te hangen, bijvoorbeeld omdat je UPC goed zat bent, wil je als imperialistische westerling natuurlijk niet onderdoen voor de buren. Vandaar dat ik even grof heb ingeslagen. Op de foto ziet u mijn schotelantenne, met kat Ender voor een juiste schaalweergave. Om met Freud te spreken: ik heb lekker de grootste. Het ding dubbelt als radiotelescoop in de speurtocht naar buitenaards leven. Gisteren opgehaald in Duitsland, waar en passant m'n Seat een nieuw snelheidsrecord heeft neergezet van 202 km/u. Geijkt, dus de werkelijke top lag hoger.
(Begin plug.) Die trip naar Duitsland was overigens niet helemaal gepland. Maar daarover leest u alles in het aprilnummer van PCM. (Einde plug.)
|
13:23 |
permalink comment(s) (3) |
Sunday, January 18, 2004
Het nadeel van een hightech trainingsbroek met Teflon (2) |
|
Nog even over het item hieronder: nee, ik ga geen foto op dit weblog zetten van Ender die zich paniekerig mauwend met zijn smoeltje tot me richt, terwijl hij uit alle macht probeert niet op de grond te stuiteren. Ik heb op dat soort momenten wel wat beters te doen dan foto's maken, zoals de kat helpen.
Stelletje dierenbeulen.
Bovendien, ik ben veel te druk met grinniken als 'ie wegglijdt.
|
20:51 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
Saturday, January 17, 2004
Het nadeel van een hightech trainingsbroek met Teflon |
|
Is dat de kat er steeds vanaf glijdt als een gaar gebakken aardappelschijfje.
|
18:52 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
Friday, January 16, 2004
Wednesday, January 14, 2004
Zo brengt de overheid je waarden bij |
|
('Normen' horen thuis op de afdeling kwaliteitscontrole salamisticks van Stegeman, de bekende 18de eeuwse Oostenrijkse dichter.)
Maar goed, even afreageren.
• Arjan komt op 7 november om 2.00 's nachts thuis, na een lange avond lesgeven in Antwerpen en het daarna afgeven van een interview aan een studente journalistiek. De straat is bomvol geparkeerd, en alle omliggende ook - op één plekje na. Als Arjan daar zou gaan staan, blokkeert ie echter de Audi 80 van zijn buurman. Arjan gooit daarom zijn auto op de stoep, op een punt waar het trottoir twee keer zo breed is als in de rest van de straat, en hij dus niemand (ook geen voetgangers met kinderwagens) in de weg staat.
• De politie ziet dat anders en plakt om 2.05 (gezien het procesverbaal) een bekeuring achter zijn ruitenwisser: Arjans poging tot sociaal gedrag kost 40 euro. Arjan vraagt zich nog altijd af achter welke boom de diender stond te wachten.
• Arjan gaat vervolgens in beroep bij de Officier van Justitie. Stuurt foto's mee van de situatie ter plekke plus een tekening van het kadaster waaruit overduidelijk blijkt dat bij het parkeren op de nog vrije, legale plek nogal wat overlast zou zijn ontstaan. Arjan stuurt daarna een tweede brief met de mededeling dat hij zijn standpunt graag mondeling wil toelichten.
• Arjan ontvangt een standaardbrief van het Centraal Justitieel Incasso Bureau waarin zonder enige toelichting wordt gemeld dat zijn beroep niet-ontvankelijk is verklaard en de verzachtende omstandigheden niet door de Officier worden erkend. Het waarom? Daar mag Arjan naar raden.
• Arjan wordt een beetje chagrijnig.
Ik overweeg nu om naar de kantonrechter te gaan. Een van de beginselen van het recht is (dacht ik altijd) dat wetten in de context van het gebeurde moeten worden geïnterpreteerd. Het druist nogal tegen mijn rechtsgevoel in dat ik 40 euro moet betalen wegens (formeel) foutparkeren, die ik mezelf had kunnen besparen door asociaal op de (formeel legale) plek voor de Audi van mijn buurman te gaan staan. Beroep bij de kantonrechter kost meer dan 40 euro, want in de tijd die dat kost, kan ik meer verdienen. Maar geld is niet het enige wat belangrijk is. En dat ik niet eens een inhoudelijke reactie op mijn (twee velletjes tellende) bezwaarschrift krijg, noch in de gelegenheid ben gesteld om mijn bezwaar mondeling toe te lichten (dat verzoek werd zonder opgaaf van reden afgewezen), vind ik niet correct. Vertel me dan tenminste waarom de context van een gebeurtenis niet telt, of althans in dit geval blijkbaar een onvoldoende excuus is. Misschien wil het Openbaar Ministerie dat burgers zich dom aan de regels houden, hoeveel overlast dat ook veroorzaakt - prima, maar wees dan een kerel en schrijf dat op.
Juridische tips zijn welkom in het reactiepaneel. Klikken op de foto levert een highres-afbeelding van het relevante deel van de beschikking op.
|
13:09 |
permalink comment(s) (6) |
Sunday, January 4, 2004
198 km/u |
|
Harder kreeg ik gisteren op de Autobahn niet voor elkaar, met een Seat voorzien van angstig op slicks gelijkende zomerbanden...
|
13:51 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
Thursday, January 1, 2004
Ja, weer zo'n suf rijtje goede voornemens |
|
• De kat voortaan in lauw water wassen in plaats van in koud (heus, het ging per ongeluk).
• Meer zinloze dingen doen (per saldo net zo effectief als zinvolle, maar leuker).
• Toch maar weer eens iets gaan doen met die gitaar- en zangervaring (hallo, rockband die op zoek is naar een snarenrammer met beperkte backing vocals-mogelijkheden?).
• M'n surfplanken weer eens nat maken (en dan niet met de tuinslang).
• Een tuinslang kopen.
• De Dam tot Damloop voltooien (mederenners, mail me voor het opzetten van een trainingsploegje).
• Een bank zo gek krijgen me een hypotheek te verstrekken, ook al voldoe ik niet aan het 'drie-jaren-ondernemer-zijn'-criterium, en een mooi huisje uitzoeken aan de Sloterkade.
• En meer in het algemeen: proberen te leven volgens Prediker 5, vers 17 (wat daar staat, zoek je gvd zelf maar op, stelletje kutheidenen. Oh vooruit, hier staat het).
|
14:16 |
permalink comment(s) (4) |
Tuesday, December 30, 2003
Nederlandse wegen weer iets veiliger |
|
De notoire doodrijder A.D. (28) uit A. is op de A9 ter hoogte van Amstelveen geflitst met een daverende snelheid van liefst 106 kilometer per uur (na correctie). In gerelateerd nieuws: Koos Spee viert het nieuws met een fles Dirck III-champagne (niet dat daar iets mis mee is).
|
11:58 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
Sunday, December 28, 2003
Wat te doen op een regenachtige zondag |
|
Fantasie: Eindelijk eens de maximumsnelheid van m'n Seat Ibiza (110 pk-uitvoering, verlaagd sportonderstel, honingraatgrille en meer proleterige extra's) testen op de Duitse Autobahn. Wellicht even doorrijden naar Dortmund om een leuk satellietsetje op de kop te tikken.
Realiteit: Een column voor PCM afmaken. Want daarvan staan nog maar twee alinea's op papier en daar moeten er dus nog zeker zes bij. Bovendien regent het en dan is de Duitse maximumsnelheid slechts 110...
|
15:26 |
permalink comment(s) (2) |
Thursday, December 25, 2003
Wel voor de poes |
|
De nieuwe Mona-toetjes (bestaande uit chocola die geen chocola is en slagroom met de consistentie van beverdiarree) vind ik persoonlijk niet te vreten. Gelukkig heb ik een kat. Die kort na het nemen van deze foto zijn heil zocht in de keuken. (De dierenarts verwacht een volledig herstel.)
|
22:31 |
permalink comment(s) (3) |
Monday, December 22, 2003
Niet voor de poes |
|
Ik vroeg me al af wat ik deze kerstmis voor Ender, mijn kitten van 12 weken, kon kopen. Maar nu weet ik het. De New York Times heeft een interview met de uitvinder van de Cat-A-Pult. Inderdaad, een katapult om katten mee af te schieten. Er wordt een namaakexemplaar bijgeleverd, maar als je 'The Real Thing' thuis hebt, hoef je daar natuurlijk geen genoegen mee te nemen. Al tijden vraag ik me bijvoorbeeld af of een vliegende kat in het voorbijzweven ook een Doppler-effect veroorzaakt.
|
14:05 |
permalink comment(s) (3) |
Deze week bij HEMA |
|
Hazelnootkoffie, zonder hazelnoot en met weinig koffie, maar wel een hartkamerverzakking veroorzakende lading slagroom. Slechts 1,95 euro. Blauw Oog heeft een foto, én een beroerte in wording, want hij werkte in tegenstelling tot joors troelie wel al dat vet naar binnen.
|
11:42 |
permalink comment(s) (1) |
Thursday, December 18, 2003
Zoep'n en angoan |
|
Noot aan zelf: als je naar een Elsevier-kerstborrel gaat, na a) 7 km hardlopen, en b) niet te hebben gegeten, blijf dan van de drank af. De schade valt geloof ik mee, al heb ik een eindredactrice die mij lief is en me complimenteerde met mijn das, als antwoord gegeven dat ze zelf wel weer eens naar de kapper mocht... (Retrolog overigens, de borrel was al dinsdagavond.)
|
9:33 |
permalink comment(s) (0) |
|
|
